I am a professional man in my 50's, married for many years with a great family and reputation. I was recently in a large SE Asian city, staying at a major chain 5-star hotel. I wanted to have a relaxing massage after the long flights. I have had legitimate massages in Asia and India so I know what to expect. I looked at the hotel's spa booklet and scheduled a 60-minute relaxing massage. At the scheduled time, I went to the plush spa, showered, put on the robe and disposable underwear and waited. The masseuse, a beautiful woman of about 25, led me into the therapy room. Well-appointed room, scented oils, soothing music and a good masseuse, and I was soon asleep. She awoke me to tell me to turn over. As she worked my thighs it seemed to get borderline erotic. I didn't want to become aroused and freak her out. But soon it was obvious that it was her intention to make it erotic. I respectfully said no thanks. I was really shocked, as this was a legit spa. But I was drawn to go back later that night. She pleasured me without hesitation. I felt terribly guilty but went back again 3 days later. I had never gone to a "massage parlor" nor to hookers. I went to the hotel's spa in order to avoid what happened. But I am now back in the US. I feel guilty, yet I am savoring the experiences, particularly feeling the perfect, magnificent body of the beautiful young woman. I know my integrity has been forever compromised. I have told nobody that knows me, nor will I. But I want to recover from this and never do it again.