A Health confession
The diploma on my office wall is a fake. I made it in Photoshop. I hired the girl at the front desk 2-weeks ago and one day she will come to work and find the office empty - REALLY empty. I'll load a rental trailer some Sunday and throw all the furniture in it and be gone to another state and another scam.
I'm not a therapist. I only went to college for 2 semesters back in the late 1980s before I decided school wasn't for me. But I've been passing myself off as a therapist focusing on female sexual dysfunction for the past twenty years and LOVE it.
Sorry, we can't file your insurance for you. You pay as you go, and I cash your checks every day and put the money right in my pocket. The landlord got his first months rent and that's the last he'll see. I never pay any bills except the receptionist, but she's just $12/hr and I'm billing out $180 for every session.
Hit a town, find a small office in a medical park and grab it. Throw together a new identity (so FUCKING easy) and pay cash to get the whole thing setup. Meet a girl at the market and make her my new receptionist. Throw together a quick ad in memo format and fax it around to all the high end doctor offices in town - "Doctor Smith's practice now open, specializing in female sexual disorders"... add in a note about referral spiffs and off we go.
Within a week I'm booked solid. It doesn't usually take me more than 2 appointments (some women come in 2-3x/week for "therapy") before your naked masturbating on my couch. Telling me your fantasies, me helping you act them out. I'm your father, your uncle, your priest, your high school math teacher, your brother, your son... whatever you need to get off.
I can usually stay here well into the sixth week before people start asking uncomfortable questions. Late notices start arriving, the landlord shows up for the second months rent, checks start getting returned. I've done this so long now I know just when to leave, when to hit the road. Maybe I'm in your town. Maybe I'm your doctor. Maybe I'm the doctor whose cock your sucking.
Anonymous
This same confession was made a few months ago....
Anonymous
so awesome. someone should make this into a movie. i would do this, but hopefully we won't be in the same town. no need to spook the same folks, but then again, this is a big country. hey, this might even work in canada, eh?