The last few months I have been stress eating - coming home and bingeing after dinner, several times a month, sometimes twice a week. Today I felt so overwhelmed and anxious and I binged, and then I made myself throw up. I stopped myself part way through. I had never done that before (purged.) I feel so ashamed that I did that. I know it's unhealthy and not a solution. I feel ashamed that I can't control my eating or cope with my feelings of stress and anxiety. I feel really out of control. I am scared of gaining weight and I'm also scared of developing an eating disorder. I don't know what to do. I feel very alone and sad.
The worst part is that I know that bingeing doesn't really make me feel any better or address the problem. But I keep doing it anyway? I wish I could stop it. I wish I felt better and more capable and on top of my life.