I just turned 46.I went to college and graduated a few times.I have been married or have dated a few times and have 4 kids(one mother was married to me and the other was a girlfriend).I am a responsible parent and a proud one.None of my relationships have been successfully.The longest lasted about 10 years.
I spent many years,married or not,dating or having sex with women; and married ones turned me on the most.I think it all started, in my early 20s,when I ran into an older couple at a club.The hubby came to my table,talked to me for a while,bought me a drink and later introduced a woman, who joined us, as his wife. He asked me to take her for a few danced and I did reluctantly.When he asked me to join them at a hotel room for more drinks,I did not object.While there,I was stunned when he asked me to have sex with her.We both enjoyed it tremendously.Hubby had sex with her after me.It changed me for life because,before that, I thought married women were sacred.I spent many years after that night gravitating after married women and their sex.
In my lifetime,I have had sex with around 300 women;a large portion of that number was married women.No specific race,age or look was important.Some were from other countries.
I have no knowledge of breaking any marriages or fathering any kids other than the four I have.About three times I contacted STDs that were quickly cured.I have tested for almost every STD imaginable and I am clean.I always thank God for that.Sadly,many friends and people I know have died from sex.
I met these women at work(I work in a women dominated industry),bars,internet,everywhere.I never really had to lie to get them.Most of the women showed interest in me first.It all seemed easy and unreal.Many of them liked the fact that I was honest upfront.I never tried to play them.We could have sex at their homes or mine,in cars,motels,friends houses,bars,church,woods,everywhere imaginable.
It bothers me greatly now, because I worry that I could have died or killed someone by infection.I was reckless.What if a married woman I had sex with got divorced later? I wonder if that is why my marriages and relationships have failed consistently.Some single women I have been with have cheated on me-it has felt like pay back.
If you look at or meet me,you will never believe that I am capable of what I am confessing about here.I cant even explain it as well as I see,feel or did it.When I look myself in the mirror,I cant even believe it.Very few of my very close friends know about some of my escapades.Now you know too!
I have slowed down now in my old age.Not because I have no desire capability or opportunity.I am more mature, can go weeks or months no sex.I don't even try to chase women let alone married ones.I just work, come home,and take care of my kids.I spend most nights in my apt alone,unless I have visitation with my kids. I never felt like a sex addict,I just feel relieved that I am no longer living like I used to.
I learned that denying a partner love and affection as a form of punishment is a bad idea-there are many aggressive men and women in the world willing to please the partner you don't want or refuse to please.The most trusted spouses are most likely the most dangerous when it comes to cheating.Many women told me that their spouses will never believe they were cheaters.
I also learned that the friend,relative,or neighbor you think has the perfect relationship may have an illusion.They may either have an open relationship or one of them may be sleeping with their friend.
One married woman confided in me that two of her 3 kids were not by her hubby and hubby had no clue.Because of that,I have done a DNA on all my kids and thankfully,they are all mine.
I am sure many men and women reading this have experienced good and bad sexual events and may identify with me.I have learned that its not about quantity but,quality.Most likely,that is what has slowed me down and made me a more responsible caring man.