F***** sad.

2010 is comin to an end. i am so glad because, 2010 is my sad year. honestly, i hate all the years ive been through.i really hate it.i always the one who gets hit by the unlucky charm.just now i thought about this year and past years.i am the worst.i am studying at one of the best school in my country.the students are so, lucky. they never had the chance of getting scold infront of classes. when i cried, they comforted me but they didn't ask whose fault. all the blames were on me. maybe i was too nice. no, i am too nice. and i always bottle up my feelings. people rarely seen me crying. they always think that i am a happy go lucky girl. well i smile alot. i stopped smiling since this year. they said i looked like a crazy girl and they f***** mocked me with actions. i am a sensitive girl. i already told them that. yet they still mock me with everything! they always say something stupid and embarrassing stuffs about me YET NO ONE EVEN STOP THEM, EVEN MY CLOSEST ROOMATE LETTING THEM TALK ABOUT ME BADLY. I was dying for her help. Why, i am so nice? why did i smile instead of crying? why i didn't scold them? why i didn't even dare to not help them? why did i risk myself to help them when they didn't appreciate what i had done?! why they always ignore my kindness? always. every year. i dont have any true, best friends. i always pray that i would meet a fairy like friend. a friend that understands me well. hmph. i remember clearly what they had done to me. i helped them. even it could make my pride down. seriously. i almost caught by just helping a friend that breaking the rule. i could've been thrown from school... then when i need her help, she didn't want to help me. i was just asking for advices and tips... LIAR. most of people i knew did these stupid things for me. ergh. i am a stupid too for remembering back my past. i just don't have a good life... :) well then, i hope 2011 will be better!

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  • thanks. i'll try.

  • Aww! I'm sorry you don't have any friends at your school. :( It's probably best to smile and be nice, because that makes other people look like bigger b****** when they're mean to you.

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