I had s** wit someone I believe had a genital sore...

I had s** with my lover after I noticed a strange bump .two nights ago he came over and wanted to have s** and he wanted me to give him oral but he wouldn't let his private go at the bottom of his shaft (near his pubic area) He let it go to turn the ceiling fan on and I noticed a bump . I didnt say anything because I brushed it off as a ingrown hair bump and I denied him oral but I did have protected s** with him . yesterday he came over and wanted to have s** and had mentioned that this time he wasn't gonna go without me giving him oral , I said only if you ket me hold your private after some stressing he let me hold it so I licked his area all the while tryna get a closer look at his suspicious bump evrytime I got close enough he jumped up to see if I noticed it but never said anything .It looked like a healing hair bump but it still didnt sit well with me. I was a total idiot to continue to give him oral (even though I avoided the bump ) but I didnt wanna believe that he would be that dirty to do me like that I've known him for years .He usually is very strict on condoms but both times he tried his hardest to have s** without a condom , and yesterday I did no different I slipped a condom on him before he had a chance to stick it in . I know there are two types of herpes and I suffer from the type that gives you cold sores so I know that if you orally please someone with an outbreak that you chance getting the cold sore strain (which I have so I didnt stress it that hard but I did protect myself from letting him give me genital herpes but im still nervous and mad because I woke up with small bumps on my upper lip . I was so mad I have outbreaks maybe twice a year but they come as big cold sores these are way different so I think it may have came from him but im hoping that it was a concidence and he didnt have it and he does have a ingrown hair bump ,but im scared to talk about it with him because im scared of the answer . Maybe he tried/did to infect me. Im so confused and mad .

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  • Okay, so this may sound sacrilegious, but I think you shouldn't freak out. Genital herpes are in fact not the worst thing ever. They are incredibly common, many people have the infection but are a-sympotomatic, and although flare-ups can be uncomfortable, for the vast majority of people its pretty harmless in terms of your long-term health. HPV (genetial warts) are also not nearly as big of deal as they are made out to be. Yes, there is evidence that for some women they may later develop cervical cancer, but the actual risk is somewhat overblown. Not all strains cause cervical cancer, and a small number of people who have or will have the virus over their lifetime will develop that complication. That being said, you have every right to demand that your sexual partners be frank with you, and for you to return the favor, so speak up and tell him your concerns. And get yourself tested.

  • Talk with him. If he says he doesn't and can't explain why he was acting so strange, maybe suggest that you both go to the clinic and submit to an STD test. If he refuses, you may have your answer.

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