I have only just realised how serious my bullimia is. It feels like I can't control it, when im not sick I cut myself. I don't want to tell anyone but I just want to be normal again.

Aug 7, 2011

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  • Im going to be frank. I delt with bulimia, its like a relationship, or smoking. addictive, and bad for you in the sence of doing it. but also hard not to cheat when trying to quit.
    I started by accident. after dealing with depression and having a breakdown, i just started. i did it every day, after every meal, untill the point my stomach felt empty, even if i knew it wasnt entierly.
    But if there is one thing ive learnt, its best to tell somone before they figure it out for themselves. believe me when i say it was the worst experience of my life.
    my depression was focused more upon from that point than bulimia as i used a white lie in telling them it was only used as a 'release' and had noting to do with my 'self image'
    i continued doing it and continued to get caught. I ended up stopping for a month and starting again, this time never getting caught. After awhile it died down, and i gained 8 kilos of weight. I slip alot, and enjoy the sensation. After all i still am a sufferer, and it is a great release-form of self harm.

    This is no way to live, it isnt healthy, god knows its not, and it really can f*** your body up for long periods of time, if not your entire life.
    Get help, tell somone, the truth. Dont try and 'do it on your own'
    Believe me when i say it doesnt work. Believe me when i say its not in your best interest. believe me when i say its not worth it. Believe me.

    Writting about this now is giving me the craving, to enjoy the sensation, it is a never ending battle between me, myself and I.
    You dont want to be like me.
    You said you wanted to be normal, but the amount of people with mental issues and eating disorders is outstanding.
    Dont be normal, because normal is wrong.
    Be yourself, and that does not involve hurting yourself.

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