I had Committed B********* as a Tween.
Well I don't know how to say this but I am a junior in High School with a dark past. As a child around the age of ten or eleven I was watching Doctor Phil and I was learning about p*** addiction on it and I got curious. So one day I was doing a project and I typed in "p***" on google. Well next thing you know I click on the first site and I am seeing all of these sexual images that were new to me at the time. Unfortunately I went on my computer at home the next few months and got addicted to p***. As I watched more p*** I became more open to gay and b********* p***. At this point I am a tween with hormones going through my body even though that is not an excuse and I wanted to experiment somehow. So I chose to basically "do things" with my two dogs around the age of 12. I highly regret it to this day and I did it also because I was often bullied and I was lonely and I did not even know it was illegal at the time. I consider myself fortunate that I stopped in January of 2009 and I regret that I did those things to this day. Fortunately puberty has stopped and I am a totally different person today then I was at the time. But I have had regrets every day since. I must say I am pretty happy. I have a beautiful girlfriend, I am in a military program, and I plan to become a police officer. Ironically, in the K-9 unit. (Just to get this clear. I HAVE NO ATTRACTION TO ANIMALS. I think it is sick that someone would do that but then realize I was that sick person.) But I just don't know what to do with myself. I believe in God and I feel like I can't get his forgiveness so I give up on religion. I know I can't make this a setback but I just want to help people and animals and those mistakes I made with my dogs has made me think I am a bad person every day since. I really regret these acts and watching p*** in the first place. Also, I feel like I can never be a pet-owner again because of these actions. I love animals and I would never hurt them after what I've done in my past. Just It is taking me a lot to post on this and I need help. Not because of sexual attraction. But to stop this guilt. I know I can't undo what I did but I just wish I could take it all back. :(May 2, 2012