And this, is actual H***.
I am almost seventeen years old. I have lived in a poor family my entire life, and my Dad is currently unemployed. We are losing things bit by bit. My mother is getting angrier day by day, and my family is falling apart. I have a boyfriend whom I love, and who I am afraid of. I'll explain that in a second. My bestfriend/childhood friend told me I wasn't worth it. He put me down for 16 years, hit me and told me how worthless and stupid I was. I miss him, because I'm so used to the abuse. You see, my boyfriend treats me well. But I'm not used to that, so I'm scared. I only remember the bullies and the beatings. My head bashing into the wall, the brain damage and mental trauma. Everything that has currently f***** me over. So tell me, how do you expect me to go on, without knowing who "me" actually is and being afraid of the only good thing in my life? When you get an answer, maybe I'll stop thinking of suicide.