Figuring a way to f*** my best friend
So here's the story. Me and my bestfriend have known eachother for a long time, around 6 years(I'm 18 now) We hung out quite a bit when i was younger, then I moved away for a couple years and we didn't talk to much. So I ended up moving back to my home town, and I ended up finding out that she's 2 houses down. From there we always hung out constantly, and got really close together. She would always say that she loves me(And my f****** god I love this girl too) that she admires me and looks up to me, but whenever she said that stuff it never really rendered in my mind to think about it. Anyways, one time we hung out and out of middle of nowhere she said "f*** me" And my mind instantly went blank, and I started worrying about how fast I c** and thought she would laugh. I mean this girl is f****** GORGEOUS and at the time I thought she was goody-goody girl, I mean s***, I can't go anywhere in public with her without atleast 3 guys hollering something and she's so f****** hot that it intimidates me, and I love it. Anyways, in my mind I said no way that she just said that and I said "wait, what?" and she was like nevermind...and i didn't want to question her again because I thought I missheard her, and sadly a couple months down the road I really thought about what she said, and know for a f****** fact she said it. She would always say I'm the most mature guy she's ever met(She dated guys that were 21-22) She think's i'm sexy, insanely humerus and that she will find a way to marry me in the future. One time, her and I took molly(ecstacy) and had a lot of conversations, and she was saying that she wanted to have her ways with me and another girl and once again I didn't say anything to her and started to worry about me c****** too quick. And we just ended up moving on with our discussion. 2 months ago, I was finally fed up with me being a p****, and I was texting her, and ended up with her saying f*** me and right there and then I knew for a fact that she wanted to. So I ended up going over to her house the next week, and we were talking and I questioned her about what she said to me "Sooo, about that text last week" She was confused and I was like...Having your ways with me and she seemed a little shocked and thought it was awkward, and I can agree because of how abrupt I was with(I was stoned, and I'm never fluid with my topics) and it was awkward for a while till I left and I felt like an idiot, and seeing how I didn't take any action since, She now has a boyfriend and every single day i'm always thinking about f****** this girl, litteraly obsessed because shes a f****** FREAK and I would kill someone to sleep with her, and plus I'm a freak too and I know I would do her real f****** good, but I just don't know how to approach her about it without being an idiot, I know she wants to f*** me more than anything and that's the worst part! I'm just always awkward with her and my confidence is low, but with any other girl, my confidence is through the roof and I can charm them so easily. I just don't get it, can anyone help me out with this annoying problem? I know she'll end up breaking up with her boyfriend so I just want to be prepared.