My cousin raped me

When I was 7, I first met my cousin, he was 11, which was 4 years older than me. He was already strong at that age, he went to the gym even though he was underage by a year to even go. He looked like one of those strong men on TV, he had green eyes, which I loved, because I have always liked guys with green eyes since I was young. I still do now, and he had black hair. Although a lot of girls his age liked him and still do he always wanted to hang out with me or he gave me dirty looks, I used to be uncomfortable hanging out with him until I turned 12.

My b****** are big an E cup now, and he always stared at them. He told me I had the perfect hourglass figure, but I just took it as a joke. I didn't want take it awkwardly and ruin any of our what I wanted to be good moments.

One day, we were at a water playgrounds, whatever it's called, I dressed in a pink bikini, and he kept looking at me, I finally asked him, "Why are you looking at me like that?" Although I didn't know it, I was blushing, and he told me I looked cute when I was blushing and I wanted to leave, but my mom made him do it. He told me to sit by him on this small-booth-like-thing it's hard to describe. And of course I did it.

I gasped when I felt his hands on my thighs. I found myself starting to like his touch as he was getting closer, and closer to my pivate area but I knew it was wrong so I swiped his hand away. I attempted to get up and go inside the pool, which was close enough for him to watch me from there, and he smacked me on my rear, causing me to yelp out. I threatened to tell my mom, but he didn't seem to care.

He touched me more and eventually got to my private area. I bit my lip from moaning, and when he tried to kiss me, I pushed him away. I didn't want him to be my first kiss. I started doing more research on incest when I got home on that day, and once I realized how far it could go, I didn't want him to even try anything.

A year later, I hadn't seen him after that, and I had forgot everything that had happened. But my aunt and uncle moved across the street from us. When I saw him, he had gotten even more attractive to me. I couldn't stop staring at him. Apparently, he had noticed because he said "See something you like?" And looked at me seductively. I liked everything about him, his arrogant but playful personality, and his husky voice. But I never wanted it to come to this point.

I think that I'm sort of in love with him, but I didn't want to do anything containing incest. Anyway, one day, I was sleeping over at his house because his parents and my parents went out on a double-date, it wasn't at night, it was going to last from morning to night. I was going to have my friends over for a sleepover, but he said no, and he tooked my phone away so I couldn't call them to tell them to come anyway.

My mom and dad had already bought things for the sleep over, like nail polish, junk food ect. And then I came up with a really bad idea, that I deeply regret. I wrestled with him over my phone. And suddenly, we ended up in an awkward position. I think it's called a 69 or something, it's a sexual position, that's all I know.

He slid down my tights (I was wearing them for pj's) and started doing you know what to my private area. I was very shocked and tried to move away but he held my thighs tightly in place. I kept struggling, but eventually I gave up and he stopped doing it once I came, I thought he would stop, but he put me on top of him and took off all of my clothes.

He made out with me, and I didn't want to struggle anymore, I was to exhausted from struggling before. It hurt really bad, but after a while I got used to it, and he did it more until our parents came back. My mom noticed I was acting very weird but I did anything not to tell her, I didn't want to talk about it and make her worried about me, I just hoped that this would blow over in a week or two, but I can't stop thinking about it.

What should I do now?

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43 Comments

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  • You should let him f*** you

  • Trolls.
    Nothin’ but trolls.

  • Oh, and everybody saying it will haunt her for the rest of her life, F*** YOU!!! Saying that type of stuff just scares pple even more

  • Go to cousin give him head swallow his c**. Let him touch you all over. Let him do you without a condom. Praise his c*** let him know your his little s***.

  • Yall sick as f*** for telling her let her keep doing. And first off that b**** nasty as f*** anyways for liking her f****** cousin and finding him attracted thats not even rape you wanted that s*** this pooh ass story i'm trying to figure out how to over come s*** like this not find s*** attractive nasty ass reporting this s*** and all who got a problem deal with it the f***

  • For all of you sick f**** out there saying she should let him keep doing it, go get some help!! That is sick!! And for you people saying she wanted it because she moaned when he touched her, she didn't!!! If you don't know anything about that part of a female, when you or someone else touches you, you have what's called an o*****, a feeling of pleasure that goes through your body, and for a female, if someone touches a female in the right spot, it's hard NOT to moan!!!! So stop being such sick f****** bastards and stop saying she wanted it!!!!

  • You should have let him do it again and again and keep it a secret.

  • Something like that happened but I'm a guy and me and my little cousin are 5 years apart I been going through things and we started doing stuff not like that but other stuff like touching and stuff and it happened until I wanted it to stop I'm 14 now and it finally stopped a month ago I regret ever doing that but it's kind of similar to this.

  • What u should do depends on what you want to happen. If u truly believe he raped you, meaning u didnt like it at all and u never want him to do anything like this again u should tell your parents and decide with them if u should involve the police. On the other hand if u are in love with him and would like to have s** just not in a forceful, aggressive manner talk to him about it and tell him how u feel. I know incest is frowned upon in our society and I personally don't understand it, but I don't judge and it is legal in some states and encouraged in other parts of the world so don't let our society tell u how u should feel.

  • Just tell your mom .....all the problems will be solve.... okay....dont think too much and live your life happily

  • All of u people talking about let him do it are just disgusting. Thats her cousin .both u and her should be ashamed of yourselves.u didnt get helped and u sat there and moaned.dont say u didnt want it if u sat there and took.u should have told ur parents then the police.but instead u kept it a secret.now its going to haunt u for the rest of your life.and you people telling her to sit there and take you should be ashamed all your doing is encouraging her to let him rape her.but thats probably all u people are good for.

  • All your good for is f****** b******* about f****** lies!!! She didn’t want it!!!! She KNEW IT WAS WRONG!!!

  • Nowdays no one give right suggestions to other ....they only imagine that thing for their pleasure and gone ....this type of thinking making many crimes like this .... disgusting....

  • Tell your mom t

  • Raped?! By a man 4 years older?! Honey go to the nice feminists and ask them for help. Be feminist yourself dear. Not the feminists who want girls to rule the world, the other type. They will help you just find them.

  • Be a good b**** and let him f*** your ass

  • Your an a******

  • No don't do that

  • The same thing happened to me 1 week ago, I'm 13 and he's 20. He got me drunk by saying "Come on just, one more!" Then things happened. He lived in the middle of no where so I could scream as loud as I could and no one would hear. The worst part was I was staying with him for 1 week just the two of us...It happened so much.

  • Sorry

  • You should tell your parents parents were put on earth to help you

  • Hi had a similar experience. I was raped by my cousin, who I liked a lot (may be in love with him), when I was 11. He raped me while I was sleeping multiple times. I didn't know who was s******* me until a couple months later. I discovered it was the cousin I liked and the reality is bittersweet. I personally think you should talk to your cousin about it first if you haven't already. Let him know that you didn't appreciate what he did even though you do like him a lot. And then if he understands and respects that of you, then you can take it to your parents or just one of them that you trust and confess. If confessing makes you feel better then it's best to do it. Also you should bring your cousin with you so that he can share the guilt. And if you are going to confess tell the whole story of you liking him and him liking you and that you may be in love with him. My situation is a bit different. My cousin didn't realize that I was somewhat conscious of the molestation. I ended up being either completely offended by s** and then can't get enough of it. It's some weird paradigm that I can't shake off. He is extremely ashamed of what he did because he was 17 at the time, liked me and took advantage of me. He is now in prison and we haven't mentioned it to anyone, I want to tell my dad to get this out of my system and put the past behind me but he doesn't even want to talk about the negative impact the situation caused me. So this is really tough for me anyway. Don't be afraid to tell, you have the right to be heard.

  • Yea tell

  • Clearly this is some disgusting pedophile writing post or an absolute r*****; you should be ashamed of yourself- I was raped from 6-16 by my cousin and I didn't bite my lip and moan or look up insest I was embarrassed scared and alone. This is so shameful you had size E b****** and an hourglass figure and flame to be a child who knows that s*** as a child. I'm now 34 and still can't think about my childhood I want so badly to tell my mother who I am very close to what J did to me but I know it will kill her especially since J and my mom are close. This is very sad I can't believe you wrote this garbage and if by .00005% this is truth you need to tell both you parents and the police because it's going to haunt you for the rest of your life and affect everything from, trust, dates lovers friends and everyday interactions

  • Oh shut up

  • It's called a confession post for a reason. To confess and ask for help. In some states, having s** with your cousin is legal. Why were you even on this web page if your just going to complain and not going to help.

  • Why having s** with cousin is legal?

  • Let him f*** the s*** out u

  • Tell the parent you think would believe you more my cousin would do it every holiday my cousins know he likes me though we stopped going there so it stopped

  • Best thing I would would do is tell the police and send that's f***** to prison.

  • U should enjoy it..

  • Tell your parents and report it to the police... he needs some kinda mental health treatment. And you should go to therapy or a 12 step program. What he did was sick but healing will happen trust me. It may take a long time, but it will happen.

    Good luck and God bless.

  • Write a book this would be good !!

  • Let him put that shlong inside you. You may enjoy it.

  • That is sick

  • Your a sick, sick f***.

  • U need to tell the police or someone about cos what he did was wrong. if he did that to u then he could do it to any woman in the future now that he experienced raping someone already.

  • It was so messed up what he did to you. I'm so sorry this happened. You need to tell your parents so he can never do this again to you or anyone else.

  • Hey it's not right what he did. You need to tell someone. You were raped and no one deserves that. You didn't want that and that makes it rape. He shouldn't of ever done that. Tell someone. Tell your parents so that they can get him put away. He's a horrible person for doing that to you.

  • Let him f*** you

  • You should have told your parents. What are you some kind of a s***? You were probably asking for it. Maybe your Mom loved that kid like a son. Did you every think about someone else's feelings? Keep your "personal business" of the internet!!!!!! What would Gramie think? ;)

  • Hbu STFU you little sicko!!! She didn't ask for it u f****** b****!!!! Now U Better f*** off M8

  • What do you mean she was "asking for it"? You b****. No one asks for rape. No one. I don't care if her mother loves that boy like a son. For doing anything like that he should be in prison. And when you've just been raped, you shouldn't have to worry about how people will react or how it will hurt your families relationship with the rapist. You should be worrying about, if anything, what you will say to them, how to bring it up, etc. And im truly sorry that anyone has to go through with this.

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