S** with my cousin
So I don't even know if this will get posted cause the site says no graphic incest stuff. I won't be graphic but this does involve incest. I'll give it a try, though It does make me more aware of what people think of what I've done, if not even this site will not let me post : / I have a sexual/romantic relationships w/my cousin it should be stated I've been abused in life, physically and sexually and a lot of it has involved family members. I'm sure this has something to do with the fact that I thought this was hot. Even though I understand that, I can't help that this is, in fact, hot to me. Once I fulfilled this fantasy, I graduated to yuckier fantasies. things I never used to m********* to, are now my go to thoughts for an o*****. So, About 9 months ago my cousin and I began a flirtation. He is my first cousin. Within days, the flirtation lead to both of us admiting that we'd had sexual fantasies/feelings about each other. Maybe a month later, I found myself driving a distance to see him, specifically to have s**. We spent 9 hours in a hotel room together. He's married and this is a horrifying shameful thing. Women aren't even safe leaving their men with family and I'm the w**** who makes that true. I've never had a sexual relationship with a married man or even an involved man and I do feel awful about it. I'm sorry to her and other married people. I get how terrible it is and that I'd hate it being done to me. It was the thing that made me hesitate. But I did give in. It was strange though, almost like it didn't count and wasn't as bad because we were family, even though I logically know it's just as big a betrayal for her and probably a thousand times more shocking and gross. But obviously we'd never really be able to run off together so it didn't seem so bad. Anyway, we had s** maybe 6 times in that room. The first time, I was worried and disappointed but the rest of the times were pretty good. He wasn't my best lover by any means but it proved to be a positive experience and the taboo factor was awesome. I'd delve more into it but I'm hoping to get this posted and due to the incest, I'm thinking it may not be. At any rate, we still flirt and talk and have made plans but they've gotten canceled for some reason or another (the distance makes it hard) but we definitely are still interested in having s** with each other. My interest likely stems from my abuse. Idk where his comes from and I'll admit it's somewhat disturbing. I'm not really fond of the idea of men wanting to sleep with family members unless maybe they were abused as well, but he wasn't so wtf? Still, in the moment it's hot. In the moment all I want is to be used my older cousin. He's ten years older. In the moment all I want is for him to see me as a s** object for his pleasure. I confess, I love it.