I've never told anyone my first a***
My husband doesn't understand why I love a*** s**. Previous boyfriends were always so happy to find that I love it and they loved it back. My husband likes it but not as much or as often as I do. It's weird I guess that I love it, it always satisfies me fully because it makes me feel so dirty. My husband didn't want to have a***, he wanted vaginal and I begged him while he was in me to put it in my butt but he said no and it made me frustrated.
I told him to finger it at least and he did for a minute then said no, he wanted my v*****. He's been avoiding a*** for a while now. He asked why do you want it in your butt so much, don't you like vaginal intercourse? I said I did like it but a*** makes feel hotter and that takes me over the edge, he asked why and said I didn't know. But I do know.
It got me thinking back to when I was 17. I started having s** three years earlier and other boys had tried a*** with me but could not get it in and it hurt when they tried. That thanksgiving we went to my aunt and uncles house. My aunt had married a man with a son my age and we got along really great, he was 19 at the time. We had hung out together socially and he knew me and my friends. He went to college and I was still in high school. The adults were all downstairs and me and my new cousin went upstairs to watch tv. We started talking about girls and guys and s**. He said he thought I was pretty and if he weren't my cousin he'd ask me out, and I said would go out with him if he weren't my cousin. He kissed me and we made out on the sofa in the upstairs tv room while adults were all downstairs. He had his hand under my dress and started fingering me and slid one into my bottom. Then I gave him oral and then he got on top of me and we were having s** without a condom. I said he had to stop because I wasn't on birth control and was afraid to get pregnant. I offered to finish him off orally but he said we could do a***. I said you can try but no one has been able to get it in. He said it's alright that he could and he went to his room and came back with some KY which I had never even seen before. He fingered my bottom and it hurt but felt good.
Someone started coming up the stairs and we rushed to put my dress down and he put a blanket over his opened pants and we watched tv nervously. The adult left after a few minutes of awkward visiting. When they left I didn't want to continue but he kissed me and started fingering me again and it felt so strange to me. I said alright but told him to hurry up and I bent over the arm of the sofa and he lifted my dress and slid into my butt. It hurt so much but felt so hot. He finished in my butt quickly and I went to the bathroom to clean up. I felt like I had to poo but I didn't it was just his come.
After that we sat closely and kissed a bit more and fondled each other but no more s** that day. We did hook up for at least a year more secretly and he'd always want a*** and I almost always gave in. After him every guy has had me anally and I've always liked how it reminds me of how naughty it is for me. It's the ultimate taboo dirty s** that I've ever had, and that mixed with the pain and loss of control send me over the edge. How can I explain this to my hubby? My husband has met my cousin several times over the years and he doesn't know.