I woke up...damn it.
Last night I toke all the oxy I had left in my last script and every other pill I had. After about a half-hour I started shaking and feeling horrible. I felt a foam like stuff in my mouth and I got to the point where I could not move and everything was a blur. I remember closing my eyes. My family was home. I was in the bed and my family was home. Spouse was in another room watching TV and kids were upstairs. They were leaving in the morning to meet some other family for an event in another city. I was to stay home. So around 11 am I woke up. I thought I would not. But when I woke up I was not able to move and my body was shaking. My brain was functioning but my body was not. I could not move. I was fully aware of everything. That was horrible. I was in that state for at least a couple of hours. I eventually was able to move my hands and arms to touch my face and finally was able to get up and stumble to the bathroom where I washed my face. I almost did it. I am so upset. If I would have had one more pill. If I had drank some alcohol. Why. Why did I wake up damn it?