Funniest s*** ever

On Halloween the kids made Jack o'lanterns and put them on the step, We had people over and after everyone left I went out and cleaned up out front, I thought everyone had left and I tossed two of the jack o'lanterns in the garbage can but I took the third inside, My wife was in the kitchen and I whipped out my c***, stuck it in the mouth of the jack o'lantern and walked up behind my wife, I took the top off and said "Can you take the light out of this one".
Well f*** me, My wife wiped the counter, tossed the cloth in the sink and just as she turned to face me her sister walked up beside me reached into the jack o'lantern and basically punched me in the d*** then grabbed it and pulled, My wife screamed, she screamed and I screamed. I spun around and dropped the jack o'lantern, Tucked my h****** away and my wife said "What the fuuck" and her sister said "Oh my god I just grabbed your d***".
My wife covered her face and said "What the f*** are you doiiiing", I started laughing and said "F***, I thought everyone left", Her sister said "yeah, I'm leaving now". Thank god everyone was a bit tipsy because it turned out to be more funny than anything else and now everyone jokes about it, My wife says "yeah just like that time my sister grabbed your d***" or her sister will say "Oh yeah...Remember that time I tried to pull your d*** off".
I don't know, I just think it is funny.

Jun 12, 2019

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