Becoming a p*** star

I’m 23, I’ve only had one boyfriend; I was a member of the Christian Union at my university (I still kind of half-believe); I lost my virginity at age 21.

Despite all this, I would really like to appear in a p*** film.

Why does this appeal to me so much?

Honestly, I would like to see if I could go through with it. I would like to see how everyone acted around me when I turned up (the naughty girl who was going to get naked and have s** on camera). Would I stay cool, or would I be a nervous wreck? Would I look sexy, or would I seem ridiculous? Supposing there was more than one guy in the scene? Supposing there was a group of guys? When I get nervous I go red and find it really hard to talk. Would I just be this nervous, shaking, silent girl, buried under a pile of guys?

I visit sites and think about sending an email and finding out if they would be interested in filming me, how much they would pay, what I would have to do... The thought of it is driving me crazy...

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  • I was at a friends house when he showed me his father's p*** collection. I knew that stuff existed but I had never seen adult stuff before. Even though I was 12 I knew I wanted to someday have the looks and bravery to pose like the perfect women in the magazines did. I wanted all men to look at me the way he was looking at them. I basically made it a personal rule that whenever a guy asked to take pictures of me, I wouldn't say no. For me, that wasn't tested until I was 13.

    I was at a beach with my family. I had gotten board so I went exploring. In the slope overlooking the beach I met a grown man with a long camera. He asked if he could take pictures of me. I was so bored that I didn't allow my Creep alarm stop me from agreeing. Since he led me into a private area in bushes and trees I assumed he was a pervert wanting more. When he suggested I undo the neck strap of my one-piece I didn't hesitate to obey. I know it is awful and I could have been molested or worse, that day, I didn't care. I was in a better mood when I left him. I knew he'd be beating off thinking about seeing me nude and I wondered why he didn't even try anything. Looking back I always pretend he did a LOT more.

    I didn't get asked again until I was already married. I still lived at home when I was in college and my parents are really strict and nosey. Good news is my husband loves to take private pictures and movies of me. I know he's shared a few of them. I feel pressure to get mad at him when I find out, but to be honest, I happily think about who he might show them too the whole time I'm posing for him.

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    medical help.

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