I'm fat, lonely and h****

I've always been overweight but now I'm fatter than ever. I don't weigh myself but if I had to guess I'm probably over 250lbs or more, probably closer to 300 lbs. I never had boyfriends except the ones who knew I'd be an easy f***. I want to be wanted but I know that's hopeless so I'm always looking for events where I can hook up with someone not disgusted by my body. I've had two experiences that were magic.

One was a convention. It was a long time ago and I don't even think the east coast nolose group even exists anymore. It was more for fat lesbians but they seemed to be all inclusive. I hadn't been with women at all but I was willing to try.

I'd read descriptions of their conventions and they were all fat people who were unashamed and I had heard there was nude time in the hotel pool and after hours sexy and even kinky parties and entertainment. I fantasized about being able to do things I'd only dreamed of like being naked, allowing myself to be seen, allowing myself to be sexy and flirty without fear of rejection. I wanted to try some of the risqué "workshops" I read about. I finally took the plunge and made reservations to go. It was several hours drive for me but worth it to make sure I wouldn't chicken out.

When I packed, I packed only sexy and revealing clothes so I couldn't just resort to safe clothes. I wanted to be noticed and that wasn't common for me. When I got there it certainly was a very open sexual atmosphere but I genuinely had the feeling it was more cliques than anything else and I thought I'd be disappointed as usual.

I went to the nude pool. I wore a partly crochet swimsuit so it wasn't obvious but if you nearby me you could see my nipples and pubic hair because the crochet holes was so open. I tried to smile but I'm shy so I don't strike up conversations. I felt invisible and thought I was going to cry.

Before I got ready to go back to my room, a very masculine woman came up to me and said there was a party in room ## and I should get changed and come. I went to my room and showered and changed and put on the most revealing and see through outfit I'd brought with me. When I got to the room it was three ladies. They pulled me in and gave me a drink and started asking about me. I was surprisingly forthcoming about being shy, being inexperienced and lonely, being straight but curious and mostly being ashamed of my body.

The women turned on music and one of them took off her clothes. I'd never seen a body similar to mine. I had mixed feelings because it made me feel like I wasn't alone but I still wanted to be one of the tiny women in magazines. The naked woman started dancing with me. She was putting her hands on me and she kissed me. I was experiencing things I'd never felt and was getting into the music, drinks and attention. The women had me strip down. They touched me, kissed me, sucked me and made total love to my big old fat body. All of them at once, paying attention to me!

I've never been a drinker so when I woke up it was later in the morning and I was alone. I wasn't sure how to feel about everything so I quickly put on my clothes and went to my room. I showered and while I was going to attend one of the events that day I lost my nerve and slipped out hoping not to be seen and went home. I'd been a mix of emotions about it for years but never heard about another event that was anywhere nearby so it just turned into a memory to think of when I used my vibrator and d****.

Finally several years ago I found another event online that was geared toward fat people and their admirers. This was a drive down south instead but about the same distance. Again, not close but not too far not to go. Again I brought clothes that would be revealing and sexy and determined to stay the entire time, let myself go. This one was weird because not that I'm a racist but it was mostly black people there. I was definitely looked at when I came in but I didn't feel rejected. I'd never really been around black people. I'd never been attracted to a black man but its probably because it didn't even enter my mind.

I was having an okay time but not great probably mostly due to me being introverted. Also I was worried about being in photographs that were being taken. I'd definitely stand out in photos and I just didn't want that online for the world to see. It's weird because I thought if I didn't draw attention to being fat that I wouldn't be thought of being fat.

Later that first evening a black couple started talking to me; they were both fat like me. I thought they were married but they were both flirting with me. Finally it ended up that they invited me to their room and they were after a threesome. He wanted to watch me with his wife and then she wanted to watch me with her husband. After that, when it got more into the "threesome" part of it, they were mostly into each other. I think they just used me to get worked up. I masturbated watching them and left at the first opportunity.

The next day I had a couple men flirting with me. One was a fatty, the other was closer to a normal size. Before evening I went to the smaller man's room and he made love to me. I had never had a smaller man pay attention to me and I was flying high. When we were through we both were saying we wanted to get back to the events but never really planned to meet later. When I rejoined the groups of people the fat man from before managed to find me again and I looked and looked but the smaller man seemed to be gone.

The drinks flowed and I was definitely feeling no pain and the fatter man was flirting with me and we finally went to his room and we ended up having s** all night. When I woke up he was already up and he said he was sorry it was so late but he had to get ready to leave and go back home. I was hustled out of his room and went back to mine.

After I'd showered and gotten dressed I decided I didn't want to face anyone else so I headed home. The whole drive back up to Maryland I kept thinking about all that had occurred. I'd done some kind of assplay or a*** s** with all three encounters and I'd never done that before. I was excited to get another d**** just for a*** use. Then it occurred to me that I didn't know any of the people's names or hadn't exchanged any contact info. I loved thinking back on how good the s** felt but I was feeling a little bummed too.

I'm not sure if anything like those will ever happen again. I don't know of any other fatty events on the east coast and I can't afford to go any further. I'm also getting older. And fat and old isn't very attractive. It was bad enough getting attention when I was young! So It's been years and I've gone back to being pretty lonely but at least I have some hot memories and use my vibrator and dildoes while I remember them.

Nov 1

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  • Good for you being so honest. I've been married 48 years and the s** just died on her part and I wasn't going to beg for her to fulfill her marital commitment. I found an escort who is easily 50 years old and had a wonderful visit with her. I weigh 170 pounds. She is probably 250 pounds, perhaps more. We have a great friendship and incredible lovemaking. It is so emotionally honest and sexually satisfying. I have both emotional and sexual satisfaction with her because she is honest and understanding about life's many situational realities. The problem can be finding that satisfying person but I encourage you to keep looking and trying. He might live two blocks away. He might be one town away. The hardest part is finding each other. The best part is loving and feeling each other's hearts, minds, and bodies. Be encouraged and confident. You deserve happiness.

  • My second Comment: Its just that you didn't meet a right person. That's it. You are beautiful but You didn't meet anyone who can see your beauty. I wish I could see you and you could see me. I want to see you because U r ideal girl for me. I want to show you myself because I want to let u know that U r a desire of what kind of man.

  • And here I am a normal person looking for a fat girl to love. I don't like skinny or shaped girls at all. I wish I can be with you. If you are fat its not ur weak point. If you are fat its awesome for someone like me. If I have option to choose between 10 girls who are fit and are in shape and you are like u told. I will choose u and reject all others. Now u know ur worth my love.

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