Do I f*** him or not
When I was 15 i had a boyfriend named Franco he was 20 and we met at a gym where my brother trained, I was a virgin. After 3 months we had s**, I couldn't keep going the first time because he was very large (Italian) and it hurt too much. The next day he said "can we try it again?" I agreed and I was able to 'get through it" I lied to my parents about how old he was, they thought he was 17 and they weren't thrilled that we were dating, but he was really nice and they liked him. Franco, used to pick me up after school and take me to the Holiday Inn and f*** me before he would take me home, usually he would have s** with me twice, sometimes we would just go park in his truck and make out but it was too small to have s** in, so I would get out and bend over outside the passenger door. I remember the first time he asked me to go down on him in his truck at the water park; i was scared because it was in the middle of the day, and people were everywhere and walking by but i did it anyway. Franco lived with two roommates and every once in a while he would take me there to have s**, I remember his friends watching from the doorway and I knew he knew they were there but he never said anything, i would get so turned on but i didn’t say anything to Franco either. A couple of times he would tell me to turn over so he could do me from behind, and when i would, there would always be like 30-45 second before he would enter me, I knew he was telling his friends to look at me while i was bent over, but again I never said anything I did what he said. And yes I did think about how bad his friends wanted to f*** me too, and i fantasized about them just coming into the room and doing it. One night at their apartment Franco had been drinking and I snuck out to meet him, he took me to the apartment and when we were having s**, he was extremely rough, almost frantic while he was pumping me, i had never had s** with him while he was drinking before, and he never usually said anything to me while we were doing it, I always made alot of noise though i couldn't help it! But that night, he kept saying "does that hurt" over and over, I kept whining/answering "yes" and he would just f*** me harder, during this, one of his friends actually came in the room and was leaning on the dresser watching us, he was drunk too, I remember making eye contact with him while Franco was pounding me, and he smiled, secretly i was coming so hard, it was wild, he was wearing shorts and i could see his h****** sticking out, at times I would wouldn't answer Franco on purpose , and he would get sort of mad and pump me harder, until i said "yes" Once Franco took me to the spring formal in a limo my dad rented, we went to the Queen Mary and he pounded me in the back of the limo from Long beach to La Mirada he even made me stick my head out of the sunroof as he did me from behind on the freeway, people were waving and honking at me but I didn't care we were still having s** when we pulled onto my street, Franco came on my dress as we were stopping, and the limo driver kept trying to open the door and we kept locking it Funny ! We broke up after i baked a cake for his "18th birthday" and put 21 candles on it and my mom caught me! Franco moved away the next year, and until saturday I had not seen or heard from him, I was in the grocery store and I heard his voice, i was shocked and happy to see him, we hugged (too long) and agreed to talk again, I gave him my cell number and took his. The problem is, I am 26 now and married my husband and I fight a lot but we generally love each other. In bed it's pretty mundane and all I can think about since Saturday is what it used to be like with Franco and I am afraid I might cheat with him. Some advice?