i had a boyfriend that was 43. we met

i had a boyfriend that was 43. we met where we worked, and i knew he still lived with his parents (had never left home) but i just thought he was painfully shy and/or was waiting for the right person to come along. i expressed my interest in him, and he told me later that he liked me too. we went out for a year, but grew apart. now he's asking me out again, but in hindsight, i think that something is wrong with him.

he would never spend the night at my place because he was afraid of what his mom would think. when i went to his house he wouldn't even hold my hand in front of her. his parents are Christians and old-fashioned, so i understand it to a point, but what do you guys think?

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  • Hmm...

    Take up masturbation.

    It does wonders for the soul.

  • the guy is still bugging me every weekend to go out to dinner--but i'm afraid if i go, he will think i want to get back together and i only really want him to get my computer back from a mutual friend of ours to whom i am no longer speaking--even my kids think he is retarded
    --original poster--

  • The apron strings will never be long enough for him.

    Though, I do know of a guy who still lives at home, but is successful with his business that he runs from the basement, and pays a lot of the bills. The father passed away about 20 years ago, so they stuck it out together. So.. it all depends on how mature he is. If he can't just hold your hand, or show his parents he's capable of loving someone other than them, time to let that fish go.

  • Maybe the reason you were dating someone like this is because of this low opinion of yourself. Often times we are attracted to the wrong people to feel like our own issues aren't so huge or bad. Keep looking for something better but work on yourself so that you may reasonably raise your expectations. And yes, something is wrong with this guy.
    Best Wishes,

  • thanks for the comments. i just had to know if the kinds of things that were going through my mind were okay. i had a lot of the same feelings as you guys did. but the thing is, he's a really nice guy and everything, and sometimes i wonder if i will ever find anyone else to love me if i don't hook up with him. i'm not young anymore, but i guess i'm reasonably attractive, but i do have a low opinion of myself

  • 43 and still living at home and worring about what his parents think is unacceptable. You need an adult not a big child


  • At 43 he still lives at home???
    Something not right in this picture.
    Move on to a guy with a little more normal life situation.

  • Talk to him about his development issues. Ask him if he would ever be able to take your relationship to the next level (i.e. move in together). If it's a no, THEN cut your losses.

  • Cut your losses.

  • give him a chance if you tell him the problem

  • I think you got to move on because its a waste of time

  • lol

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