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Everyone has told me to not look and
Everyone has told me to not look and "the one" will find me. I've had my heart broken 7 months ago and repeatedly bruised time and time again the months after. I try to keep positive but I'm scared...scared to open myself up to someone again, scared that i'll be alone, and scared that he WILL find me but he won't be what i was expecting him to be.
Sounds like you need time and you need to digest the heart breaking episode that happened in your life.You will come out stronger if you spend some time alone and do some soul searching. No one in your life should be so indispensible because no one really is indispensible in this world.
What doesn't kill you will make you stronger. Brak somone elses heart for the power trip.