haunting past desensitized heart

I am married to my highschool sweet heart. My past with him hurt so much, we dated off and on for 2years. He cheated on me many times and I am not sure what really actually happened in those 2 yrs. I could not live without him he is the one for me. I love him so much. We now have a toddler son and we are married, recently I found women's clothing in our room and I am hopeless. He says he was drunk at a strip club and accidently brought them home. He has been a wonderful faithful husband for the 3yrs we've been married besides this and that I know of. I believe him.. but because of our past I am hurting so much now. I find myself wanting to sleep around and flirting with out men. I am desensitized to cheating. I am numb to it. I want to cheat on him to make it even. He doesn't like talking it out, and denies cheating. I am SO LOST. I don't know anything anymore. The only thing i do know is .that I love him and want to work it out but I don't know how, I don't know if he is true to me. I can't let go of the past and my trust for him is off and on. I don't know if i left him that all men are like that. I have never been with anyone else either. PLEASE HELP ME GIVE ME ADVICE

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  • i know what youre' going through... and i would say once a cheater always a cheater.... but things can change if you know really deep down inside that he's staying true to you then go with your gut feeling but if the signs are telling you otherwise you need to cut your loses... you deserve more and it's not worth your time and effort to try to keep something that just wont work in the end... relationships really do come down to trust and if you can't trust him youre always going to question every action that's being taken by him... go with your gut feeling i'm sure it's never set you wrong.... stay true to yourself and remember that a 'mistake' is just a learning process.....

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