I'm so scared. What should i do...?

My mum is somewhat mental and occasionally after work she makes me ride my pet turtle and try to hunt rabbits while riding the turtle and i dont know what the h*** to do...

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  • How f****** big is your turtle!

  • ur mom wants u to be the turtle,which means she wants u to stick ur head in the place u came from.in other words ur mom wants to f*** u,the rabbit is a metaphore for her bush

  • How do you catch a unique rabbit?
    Unique up on it.

    How do you catch a tame one?
    Tame way.

    Try telling her that. If THAT doesnt cure her, go to the butcher and buy a dead, skinned rabbit and put it right next to her as she sleeps, then get some crazy look in your eye while riding your turtle and tell her you "killed a rabbit today, mummy!!!" Then start drooling and grinning and laughing maniacally. I think THAT would really help. If you can't find one at the butchers, get a live one, ride your turtle in the tub, pick up the turtle in your undies and cut its throat (it'll scratch and the scream like a person). Then repeat the other bits for mum (crazy eye, etc.). I think that kind of shock treatment would have interesting results if nothing else, but I don't claim to be a physician... If all that's too much for you just buy a rabbit skin and some stage blood from eBay. Get a roast and raw chicken legs, smear the stage blood all over the rabbit skin, roast and chicken your hands, mouth face and body and THEN do the bit about drooling and the turtle... Bite the roast and spit it on the floor. Should be a bit of fun! Cheers!

  • I meant pick up the rabbit while dressed in your knickers, not the turtle and don't dress anything but YOURSELF in them.

  • worked for me

  • so whats the problem? if u know a better way of hunting rabbits id like to hear it

  • I'm so sorry. That sounds really upsetting (I mean, it's funny if it's just a story, but not if it's real). You should talk to someone you trust about this and see if you can get your mum on some meds or something.

  • you must be a complete f****** idiot if u think this is true.F****** moron

  • HAHA that sounds awesome

    [img]
    http://i1258.photobucket.com/albums/ii525/IrvinDagdagan/signature.png[/img]

  • Ride the damn turtle and shut your scone hole.

  • Tell The Police If you want a new family , But If Not Try and work with her .

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