29 yr old male virgin

I am a 29 year old virgin. I am a somewhat light skinned black male. I'm attractive, well at least thats what Im told a lot. But, Im stll a virgin. I sick and tired of it. I cant ever seem to get ahead in my life when it comes to love. H***, its not just the s**, its really just the feeling of having someone to hold and know that they care about me. It really is. But every girl(few) ive knon, they always say that they dont see me that way. I try to be nice to women cuz i was raised that way. Raised to be nice, kind, forgiving, and loving. But they dont seem to want that. They prefer guys who cheat, lie, curse them out, and even abuse them. One girl in my youth is now with my ex best friend. He honest to god, told me, "Man that girl is fine, if you dont get with her, I will, she fine as h***". I was trying to be good to her, but she chose him. Most recently this girl I know i think is using me. She always says she wants a good guy. So, I do my best to do for her, to show her that I care about her. Ive done it all, for her, but yet she dates guys who dont care for her, then calls me to complain bout it. She says im the best guy shes ever known, but she wont give me a chance. Im just tired! Ive been thinking lately why not just end this. why not. who would care and who would miss me. But, the only reason I dont is because i dont want burden my family with the cost of my funeral. If not for that, i wouldnt be here typing this. and no, i refuse to pay for it. maybe this is a cry help instead of a confession.

Aug 4, 2012

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  • Yeah, ive been that guy before too... sometimes, it all about confidence. Its not so much that these girls prefer guys who cheat and such, its more that they prefer guys who are confident, and take control. Its just a lot of those kinds of guys take it too far into the cheating and what not.
    You can be a nice guy, but still "take" what you want. A lot of these girls are probably maybe waiting for just that... theyve met this lovely nice guy, want more to happen, but they want to know he's a man and can make them feel wanted and desired, not just loved and cared for. They can get love and caring from family and friends, from a boyfriend or partner? There's so much more a woman expects!
    Just take the leap big man! Go for broke, at this point you feel like you have nothing to lose anyway, right? Maybe it doesnt work out with the first few girls you make a move on, so what, that happens to everyone anyway... but at least you'll be taking positive, forward, confident steps.

  • omgosh this mistaj girl is faminal
    i u ever read this u shud yots b a writer or blogger
    its amazingly insperational and up beat i think u saved this guy from suicide and u sound almost like u did reasearch or ur a copmuter

  • It's going to be ok. Maybe if you start ignoring her she will want you more. Act nonchalant, but not too harsh. I'm a girl and I know we as humans want what we cant have.
    People get turned off by someone who is always too available. You have to be hot and cold. It will confuse her and that creates mystery, she will think about you more because she will be trying to figure you out. It will make her want you. You can even make up the reason for not always responding to her as you gad a date etc. She will start to get jealous and crave you. One day the right girl will come along who will appreciate you for you. But don't end your life please. There's so much to live for! You'll see :)

  • Ha ha. I know exactly what you mean. I know countless women who say exactly what the women you know have been saying. It is so stupid. But I can assure you that not all women are like that: me for one. And I actually met another girl two years ago who is the same. I find the guys the girls go after (the jerks) a turn off because... well, they're jerks most of the time. Both this girl (lets call her Jessie) and I now have non-j*** boyfriends. They're the sort of guys that have always been friend-zoned as the shoulder-to-cry-on etc and they are genuinely NICE guys.
    You sound like a nice guy too. And there ARE women out there who do like (and go for) a nice guy. So there is hope out there :). They're just a little harder to find unfortunately.

  • Your insecurities are hampering your relationship radar and women are getting mixed signals from you.

    Concentrate on the type of woman you are after and when you find one suitable engage her in some innocuous conversation. If you still find her intriguing get your courage out and step it up by asking her out for coffee.

    The reason you have not succeeded thus far is your ambivalence so work on that, like an essay for school. Your Skin color is irrelevant so don't limit your choice

    Never lose heart.

  • please dont end your life..you have so much to live for..hang in there..find some good people to surround yourself with

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