Pregnant and feeling guilty about what I did.

My husband and I have been having issues with intimacy. After we had our daughter my s** drive was completely dead and we literally stopped having s**. I felt ugly and fat and never in the mood even though he was. I started working out and eventually got back my pre-baby body back and felt hot and ready again but by then things felt weird between us. He seemed so angry at me like I was withholding it on purpose and did not understand my feelings. One of my coworkers was always so understanding and eventually we started seeing each other discreetly. We always used protection but I missed my period and took a pregnancy test which came out positive. My doctor confirmed I had gotten pregnant like a month and a half before. I literally panicked. I seduced my husband a few times but he kept pulling out before c******. The last time I got on top of him and wouldn't let him pull out. He got mad at me because he knows I'm not on birth control and we have been having problems. I think I can convince him it is his but now I know he doesn't even want more children with me. I feel guilty about what I did and horrible that he is going to think this kid is his. I don't even know if my marriage is going to work out and it's all my fault for not fulfilling his needs when I felt bad about myself. He is a good man and does not deserve this.


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  • Don't ever tell anybody. You did right by doing it on top with your husband, he has no need to know. You did fulfill his sexual needs when you were on top of him.

  • I hope you start on fire and die, you are a piece of trash, if my wife did that to me and didnt start on fire, id light her up myself

  • You may be the most selfish person I've ever heard. Just because your s** drive is tanked because you feel fat, does not give you the right to withhold from your husband the s** he needs. You could have been unselfish and given it to him anyway while you worked on YOUR issues that were not his fault. He had every right to be angry and distant from you. And your response was to selfishly f*** someone else and get knocked up by him. God you're pathetic. I hope he dumps your sorry ass and cuts you off of any money.

  • Three important things. First, your husband could totally have gotten you pregnant without nutting off inside you. Pre-c** is every bit as potent as actual c**: the fact that there's less of it doesn't mean it's not capable of knocking you up, and it happens all the time. Second, your husband may be a good man, but he clearly wasn't fulfilling his responsibilities in the bed room, regardless of your physical condition, and even after you regained your original body-form, because you had to go out of the house to find pleasure and satisfaction, another thing that happens all the time. So, he isn't without blame, and you shouldn't view him as blameless, and you as totally responsible. And third, you won't be the only woman to ever raise a secret illegitimate with a man who wrongly believes the child to be his: this, too, happens all the time. Trust me, because I know what I'm talking about. My youngest child -- a surprise born 11 yrs after her nearest sibling -- was the product of my illicit affair with another man. Like you, once I discovered that I was pregnant, I went into full CYA mode and lied my way to maintaining my marriage and convincing my husband that his seed had done the deed. Not even my lover knows he fathered what is now my favorite child; favorite, because of the sexy circumstances. Don't give up on what you're already doing, and doing VERY well. And don't blow your cover, and DO NOT ABORT: you won't believe how wonderful it is to carry another man's child to term, and the give birth to it, and then raise it, while fooling everybody involved about just who fathered it. Enjoy that, because there's nothing in life that is nearly so delicious as an adulterous pregnancy and adulterous child. I'm still glad every day that I did what I did, and that things happened just the way they did.

  • You're a dirty w****.

  • What happens when he goes with you for a pregnancy checkup and doc says the baby is six weeks older than when you had s** with him? What happens when the baby is born at what appears to be a premature stage and he asks the doc about it? I don't think you can keep this a secret. When he finds out he is an unwitting cuckold and that you were lying to him he will be very very upset with you. If you come clean now you will probably wind up in a divorce, but it will be much less traumatic than when he figures out what you did on his own.

  • Don't tell him. Don't tell your lover. Don't tell your family. Don't tell your best friend. Don't tell the girls you drink with. Don't tell ANYBODY. Not ever. And stop feeling as though all of this is irreparable and all your fault, because it isn't. Your husband had a hand in the making of the troubles between you, and is at least somewhat responsible (if not primarily so) for your decision to stray. We do not live our lives in a vacuum, and all of our experiences contribute to our outcomes, both good and bad. If you still love your husband, behave accordingly, and raise the child accordingly. No one ever needs to know about the paternity of the fetus or the baby or the toddler or the child or beyond, and you don't need to tell them. Start each day fully believing that your family is good and strong and deserves the best, and make all of them believe you believe it. I'm not suggesting you PRETEND these things are true, but that you actually BELIEVE these things are true and show it in your actions. People cheat, people lie, and it happens every day, and yet the world still continues to spin on its axis and those people's lives continue undeterred, and in some cases, happily. Be among the happy ones, and let your secrets remain secret. Stop dwelling on or obsessing over things you can't change, and deal with the reality of your situation ......... AND MAKE IT A GOOD ONE.

  • No, he doesn't. And what is pathetic is that so many people, like yourself, try to mend your marital problems by seeing someone on the side rather than communicating and fixing your problems with the only person who can truly fix the situation, your husband. It's no wonder the divorce rate is so high these days. You need to come clean about who the child's father is with your husband. It's not fair at all that you lie, and chances are he will find out on his own and that will be far more damaging across the board then if you come out with it now.

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