i feel guilty feeling hopeless. is there any point

my guardian. you have pancreatic cancer and your so strong. you are my inspiration. you are never negative. i hate my life and my self. and im so sorry for feeling this way when everyday is such a fight for you. im so sorry you had to take me in even if it was before you were sick.it would have been so much stressful without me there f****** everything up.

.my parents. you are both alcoholics and manipulators.. I sometimes imagine how im going to react when i hear that one of you have been found overdosed or comatose. I imagine how im going to give a speech when i graduate next year and thank everyone except for you two. I hate that i am forced to support myself. im angry at how depressed i've become. i shut everyone out and i dont understand why; I hate that you steal from the government. . you both are absolutely insane. or am i just absolutely insane.

i feel so guiilty that i have so much hate for you all. i feel so guitly because i feel absolutely hopeless most of the time. really. what is the f****** point in working for this american dream. to stay productive and busy? to accomplish your goal to what fall in love? get a great job with a house?

honestly... there has to be more to life. i feel hopeless and i can't get out of this feeling. what is the f****** point.. if your working so hard the rest of your life to chase this dream. you are never satisifed. will there ever really be a point? will you ever feel completely satisified. what if this is all there is to life. i feel hopeless when there is such poverty and worse things in the world.

everyone has a story. why i do i feel so compelled and entitled to feel guilty and hopeless when others dont even get the oppportunities that i do.

what is wrong with me. i am a f****** a******.

Jul 8, 2010

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  • Don't feel Guilty :) I have moments like this too, but I just go up to my room and sulk and for some reason its makes me alot better :)

  • clearly someone who grew up in a testosterone fueled family. There's more to life than being manly.

  • above comment, it is people like you that make the world that little bit darker for others.
    Get a f****** life, you're putting people down over a confessions website? this person has posted this to get something off their chest and maybe recieve a little advice.
    How sad are you? does it ake you feel better bringing people down via the internet?
    grow up

  • I agree with the comment above...life is about living it. i mean were gonna die right? regardless of if theres a heaven or h*** or not, everything will come to an end. With that in mind, why dwelll on the negative? i used to (and actually still kinda do) catch myself falling into that "whats the point" mindset, but thats a waste of the precious little time we have on this earth. Sure there are evil people out there, and it seems that they outweigh the good, but try to stay postive...the reason that there is so much evil in the world is because good people are becoming corrupted by the negative influences around them...ya just gotta rise above it..live isnt about landing a perfect job or falling in love...life is about being happy..life is about coming to terms with everything and everyone around you and being content with it...and if you dont share that view then MAKE yourself..you know? if you feel like your life doesnt have a point, make it have one. use that frame of mind as your fuel for seeking out true happiness...Its hard but stay strong :-)

  • you are not an a******. You've got heart enough to recognise the people in your life that matter.
    You're right, there is more to life. It's finding what makes YOU happy and hanging onto it for dear life.

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