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It intoxicates me to show my wifes ** pics to strangers

I have been showing unaware, (and some old polaroid aware), ** photos of my wife to other men, mostly on online sites for some time now. The mere thought of it is literally intoxicating. I really want to watch her have ** with another man, but she won't go for it, so this is how I get off, but I would like for her to pose. Is this normal? any suggestions how to restore a once, borderline, ** to get back into it again? we are in our late 50's.

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