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I lied
Even though we ended our relationship months ago, I lied and told him I was over it all last month. Perhaps just so we could get over the weirdness the breakup brought and get back to being friendly. Now every time I see him, I melt and everything I felt before is felt again. I miss meeting up with him every night after work. I miss his stupid jokes. I miss his spontaneous night activities. I miss sitting together, and not saying anything. I miss breaking the rules. I miss being with him.
...and every time we go out now, as friends, it kills me.
Then you need to stop being friends. Either say how you feel or move on and distance yourself. No need to put yourself through the pain.