I'm in an mutually abusive relationship. I yell at him, he yells at me, I hit him, he hits me. I feel guilty for doing it, but I just want to defend myself and the best defense is the best offense. I've only told a couple friends and they all tell me that I've done nothing wrong when I know I have.
My parents don't like my boyfriend and don't know that we're going out. He sneaks into my house almost every night to be with me. He really wants to meet my parents, but I don't want him to. If he met my parents he'd be spending more and more time at my house and I need space from him. I have him come to my house while their sleeping not just because it's convenient, but because when he gets mad at me, he is forced to control his loudness.
I'm terrified of making him angry, but I do things that intentionally make him mad. I feel like I like the way he's treating me. He tells me that he loves me because I fight him back instead of becoming submissive.
He reminds me so much of me that it's scary and sometimes I feel like being with him helps me understand my own behavior. However, I know it's unhealthy and illogical, but I just can't stop.
Whenever I try to leave him he promises to change and I believe him... he gets a lot better and then a lot worse, and the cycle continues.