I hate my older brother and wish he was
I hate my older brother and wish he was dead every day. I think about it constantly. I picture him getting hit by a car. and I smile when I think about it. And I think he deserves it completely. He's a disgusting horrible person who shouldn't have a single good thing in his life. He steals, lies, uses drugs, abuses his kids, neglects his kids, uses everyone around him for everything he can get and is a general piece of s***.
I don't love my little brother at all. I thought it was just because we fought so much as kids, but even now that we're both well into our 20's I still don't care about him in the slightest. I don't hate him. I just don't care that he exists. He's not a bad guy, he's just a loser. He has no personality.
Everyone would think I'm crazy if I told them this, everyone I know thinks I'm a saint. So I pretend every single day. and hate myself for feeling that way at all.