I am not happy about what I do. As everyone in the world explains, everywhere around us is s**, sexual feelings...just S** S** S**! And the first thing i REALLY saw of "s**" was a video of two girls that were making out; this was in 5th grade..it was accident, I swear. But ever since then I haven't been able to stop watching...and lets just say, the range had broaden. I use to call it pretending to have s**..but we all know what its really called (I'm not going to say the word..I get the hibbie jibbies just thinkin about it..but it starts with M). Now at 14, going on to high school..with boys who aren't stupid! I'm nervous as h***. I've told, just about everyone.. "I'm not going to have s**, its scary, gross and I'll adopt." But, now what? I'm so into it..but just watching..gross right?
I told my mom about it..I cried the whole time. I'm so scared I will go to h***, but I pray sometimes..and I pray to everyone that God will forgive me.
But can God forgive when you pray, then do it, then pray and then do it again.