I think i am a lesbian

I am a female and divorced. Since I was in my teens, I always liked to look at women and theirbodies but I never had a desire to want to kiss or be with one. I always dated men, got married in my 20's and am now 40 and divorced. My husband was a cheater.

After my divorce, I am finding the desire to be with a woman growing stronger every day.
I am in conflict with my religious beliefs that say homosexuality is wrong. My family are conservative christians and if I ever admitted I had lesbian desires, they would say it is wrong. I know if I got into a relationship with a woman and told my family, I would be disowned.

I am very close to my family and siblings and do not want to be exlcuded because of this.

I enjoy being with men but also desire being with women too. Am I bisexual?