I graduated early, so I'm 17 and in

I graduated early, so I'm 17 and in college. I haven't made any friends so far, I'm too nervous to ask the other students for help when I'm stuck, and I feel so scared and lonely. I only have two friends in all and I never see them because they're still in high school. I want to make friends or even get out and try to date, but I can't bring myself to talk to people at school because I feel like even if they grow fond of me, they won't want to be my friend if they find out I'm at least a year younger than them or they'll write me off as naive and "adorable" and treat me like a pet instead of a friend. I especially am afraid of trying to date for the same reasons on a higher scale.
Every day, I see everyone else talking to each other and making new friends in the class but I'm always alone and watching from the sidelines. I just wish I had at least one friend, someone to talk to at school, even if it's just, "Hey, how are you? Did you have trouble with the English homework? So what are you doing this weekend?"

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  • This is the 2nd poster back again (after a while). Sports was just an example. You need to find some way just to get someone else talking. Sports is but one example. You don't even need a topic. Try "how's it going?" Make it seem a little silly with a question like "how's your semester going thus far?" Say it with a smile. Get people talking about themselves. You can always ask someone "where are you from?" Then follow up on that with another related question. Once you've figured out how to get someone talking, you'll be in great shape! Good luck.

  • This sounds exactly like me. I started university early. I felt left out because I was younger. I have made some friends, after changing universities and being alone for a long time. If you don't meet people and just be social you may get really depressed like I did (I had to go into the hospital). I find that when I'm alone I tend to think to hard (aka shrink myself/wallow/be really emo). I've also noticed that this happens to a lot of really smart people; and well, we must be smart if we're started university early. I too am well...for lack of a better word.."alternative", and this can often be more alienating; however, if you're nice to people and are open, most people make nice acquaintances. At most university there are at least one "alternative" crowd. At my university there are a couple; a resource center for those who are gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered, a pagan society, there are a group of kids who play magic (they are the uber nerds, in a good way), there is a group of kids who hang out under the clock and play hacky sac, there are the drama geeks. I find that those who are considered "nerds" usually aren't mean because people have been mean to them. So don't think too hard.

  • Thank you very much to the above commenter. However, I have a question if you're still around here... What if the guys I like don't like sports? Most of the guys I like don't like sports at all. This is partly because I am somewhat involved in...how do I say this? Alternative subcultures, maybe, and my taste in guys is usually nerds.

  • I was something like this in college, although I was 18. (You'll soon realize one year is nothing.) First of all, you are obviously bright with a bright future. Don't throw wash up academically because you're concerned about your social life. BUT, do invest in your social life. Here's the advice I wish I could have gotten as a desparately shy fall semester freshman: Don't fear rejection! Just develop a few basic social skills that can get a conversation going. If it doesn't take off, realize there are about 1,000 possible reasons for this, only one of them is that they don't like you. Humor almost always works, something light. When people see you're able to smile and laugh, they begin to form a positive idea of who this new person is...someone they'd be willing to speak with. If it's guys you want to make friends with, use sports! You are the president of your life. Make a plan, s**** your courage to the sticking point, and go ahead. Then, learn from your mistakes. I still am at 35 yrs old, and I don't plan on quitting that habit. Besides, learning good social skills is very important, but not something you learn in a class.

  • You have to be proactive. How can you make a friend if you refuse to talk to anybody?

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