We are all part of a society that have impulses we may or may not have control of. We fight with what is morally right or wrong. I have been fighting with my own urges and wrong doings (socially acceptable and morally acceptable). My fight is with our maker for creating us unequal. I am a 50 yr old male, not attractive, married to a very pretty women. We are married for 21 yrs with 2 children 20 and 14. She is very traditional (Indian) like myself, but her s** drive far lower than mine. BJ etc. are gross. I have had many fights with her to satisfy my needs, but she knows no better. I have never done anything to cross the barrier and neither has she. In my mind though I fantasize (overwhelmingly) about my hot neighbor or any women that attracts my fancy including the internet. This becomes a fixation for me, and in the bathroom I m********* with this fixation. On the occassion we make love, my mind brings forth this fixation for me climax quicker. How sad!!!