I like eating my own **

I have a fetish for eating my own **. I know I'm not gay. What's irritating is I find it so hard to do, as soon as I ** I chicken out. I ** off to hot girls telling me to eat my **, but even that doesn't work most of the time. I thought if i could do it once I could do it a million times, but it isn't the case. I've eaten my ** in different ways, i've come into brioche rolls, onto cookies, ** straight into my mouth. The last time I remember doing it and actually following through was an instruction where I was told to ** off once and collect the load in a cup. I would swig from the cup, and each time gargle my load and swallow when I was permitted. Then after I finished my load I jerked off again into the cup and was told to swallow my load again. The loads were huge and I felt very humiliated, submissive and happy. But since then I haven't been able to do it regardless of which video I use. There was this recent video where a girl plays a game of chance with you, if you lose you eat your ** and she fixed it so I lose. It was so hot, but I couldn't do it. As my own punishment for not following through, I'm staying in chastity for two weeks, ** but no **. This will be a double incentive, I usually ** buckets but this time my ultra blue ** will produce a giant load even by my standards, and if I ** out two weeks of chastity would have been for nothing. I'll let you know what the outcome is