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Something, anything. Waiting, hoping, wishing, dreaming. Expectations. Thinking, imagining, wanting. Somethings coming. When? How? What? Where? Why? Answers whirling in your mind. Which one is right? How can you know? There's too many possibilities. Isolate, evaluate, think, solve. Where do you begin? There's too many starting point. Pick. How? Random; it doesn't matter. You're wasting time, just go. Now what? Work. Don't stop until you know. What's the answer? Do you have it yet? How could you? That's wrong. Go. Keep working. Time. You're wasting time. Move faster. Work faster. Think faster. Yes, it's fair. No, it's not possible. You still have to do it. Stop complaining. You're not done. You're almost there. Just keep going. You can do it, I think. Faster. You're not putting everything you have into this. You can do so much better. Lazy. You're being lazy. Don't look at me. I can't help you. This is on you. It's hard isn't it? The working. The responsibilities. It's not easy. That doesn't mean stop. Listen and work. Listen and think, but don't talk. You're not allowed to talk. Keep your thoughts to yourself. They're yours, not mine. You're closer. Almost done. Work. Think. Work. Think. Listen. Don't talk. No breaks. Keep going. Let's go. You can move faster. Why did you stop again? I said not to stop. You're done? Great. Now what? I don't know. Did you get the answer? Yes. What is it? Nothing. The answer is nothing. Wrong. You made it nothing. You made the answer nothing because you couldn't figure out what to do with the problem. If you had worked out differently, the outcome would've been different as well. Your choices led up to this. Did you want this? Did you wish for this? Is this what you were hoping for? These were all your hopes and dreams are your wishes? These are the expectations you have for yourself? I'm ashamed. This is experience, A very good one. Well, it could've been. Give it name. This was all your doing. You should be the one to name it. What would you call it, this experience? I'd call it life
When ones hands are tied and you are blindfolded and a flogger is gently but firmly stinging your back, all the rest of life melts away. The stress of the every day is gone. For that short time, you live just in the moment. Sometimes it is revelling in the stimulation. Sometimes it is struggling to survive the pain of the cane. But always refreshing, heat pumping.