I act like a prude but I'm secretly a pervert.
I'm underage and female, and around the age where hormones are starting to work. People I know are starting to wear less and less clothing, they're starting to drink and I know a few people who aren't virgins at the same age as me. I'm not saying I'm better than them at all - they can do what they want, it doesn't effect me - but I'm one of the nerdier people in school. I love writing, I read a lot of books, and I have that know it all reputation. I have been watching p*** in secret for the longest time. I have attempted to m********* a lot - never had an o*****, but that doesn't stop me from trying. I tried to use the showerhead and I've humped things but I'm scared of getting caught. Everyone who knows me thinks I'm too mature to deal with that and too focused on getting good grades. I've never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend, and I don't even hug people. I desperately want a vibrator, but I'm too scared to ask for one, I'm too nervous and underage to buy one in a store, and I don't want to order one online because my parents would probably find out. I've never felt comfortable enough to wear a bikini when going swimming with friends, family or the school, but I want to know what it's like to o***** and I want to be a little more intimate with someone. I'm not going to try actual s** until I'm legal, but...is it weird to be like this? I was a very early bloomer, if that helps.