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Lovesick
I obsessively think about a man I'll never have. I have tried everything I can think of to forget about him and get over him but I can't shake it. I feel physically sick in love all the time.
I'm the same, but the male counterpart. I've loved this girl for 9 years. Can't get over her. Can't forget her. She's off limits for me. 10 years younger, she was only a child when I fell in love with her. I never did anything, doubly so because she was family. doubly off limits. Still love her. I actually doubt I'll ever forget her.. worst thing is that I get the feeling she loved me then and maybe still loves me to this day.
The OP, lovesick might aswell be the one I can't get over. I have such similar feelings as OP.
I have the same longing and pain. There's a black man I know that I am in love with. We are both married to other people and I can't even get him to have an affair with me. He knows I'm in love, but he won't fling with me.