I am a horrible person (please read)
I recently (about 6 months ago) cheated with my best friend's girlfriend, I was sort of with this other girl but we broke up 1 year and 9 months before it happened. We were like friends with benefits but I still really loved her but I don't think it was mutual. Well my feelings developed for my best friend's girlfriend and we made out but I abruptly ended the kiss as my conscience new this was wrong. My friend hated me for so long but somehow he found it in his heart to forgive him, we are now good friends again and I love him so much he's an amazing guy. The his now ex-girlfriend and him are kind of in a similar situation to me and my 'friend with benefits' but they seem a lot closer.
Now for the confession. Although I seriously still love my ex and I would relish the opportunity to get back together with her, I still sometimes feel the spark that brought me and my best mate's girl together. What I mean by that is I sometimes want to pop up to her and just chat, nothing really forward just a nice little chat like the ones we used to have however I feel like that will hamper my relationship with both my ex and my mate who I am both really good friends with. I always pull out of the chance to talk to her but it just makes me feel like s***.
Do you think I should try talk to her? If not what should I do - I need help.