How to get royally F*@ked up.. and not for the reasons you think.

So this is how you f*** up your individuality, purpose and will to survive. I will even break down how to avoid this into three easy steps towards the end.

As I sit here on a Wednesday night (briefly taking a break from the barren waste that is my working life and what i used to call my business) I ponder how it went so wrong.. I have 2 sons the eldest of which I adore. He is smart, funny and full of character we have an ace relationship and I am truly glad to have him.

The second has done nothing but ruin my life since the moment he was conceived shattered my marriage, ruined my business, eviscerated my recovering social life and set fire to my wallet (To be fair to him the last one is a metaphor he can't use matches yet) . A mistake that should have been treated as such. As a bit of background I have been married for 6 years our eldest is nearly 4 and our youngest is 9 months. My Business was in it's early stages when I found out he was due and where I thought we would be able to discuss any "Mistakes" that occurred and have an adult conversation about it. But no. I was told flatly we are having him and thats it. For those of you that know the UK and our Family courts you will know that at this point I had the choice. The choice of staying married with an extra child I didn't want Or get divorced lose contact with my son and get bent over by a Judge wielding the giant d**** of financial robbery and no Vaseline.

I was heavily disappointed in my partners theft of my trust, freedom and reproductive rights. However this is 2016 I am basically a walking wallet with occasional rampant rabbit function iv'e made my piece with that.

Anyway back to the problem. My wife went into serious pre-natal depression... fun. Lost clients as I was having a ridiculous amount of family time off (Coincidently my wife has not worked since about a year into our marriage.) then he arrived. The theft of my sleep money and life. Social life: Gone. Sleep: You try sleeping with a constant "eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh eh" going on with the occasional burst of "WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH". Work: well the competition began wiping the floor with me as the sleep deprivation kicked in and the phone calls of "He Just won't STOP" kept rolling in. Money: Guess....

And on to the confession part of this and my three easy steps of how not to f*** up and my advice if you find yourself in the early part of this situation.

Step 1: Make sure everybody in a relationship is crystal f****** clear on what happens in the event of unwanted pregnancy

Step 2: Have a stash of money she doesn't know about. Even if your finances are separate have a super separate super secret account with all your spare cash in.

Step 3: If you have the option don't marry ..... everyone has more rights that way. The ring also does something to women....

The Confession. If I could give my second son away tomorrow he would be packed tonight.....

Nov 16, 2016

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  • I'm a woman and I think your wife has been really unfair to you. Seems like she just wanted to have kids and stop working. She's using you.

    With how simple birth control is to use and obtain you know she wasn't trying to prevent anything. It is the woman's job to make sure this doesn't happen, feminists can cry all night about that comment but it's the truth. I wouldn't trust a man over myself. I've certainly never had any accidental pregnancies because I didn't want kids and I got an IUD.

    It's really too bad that so many women are such liars and users. Disrespectful to men just because they can be. I don't blame men at all for not wanting to marry the way most women behave. They're also so hateful about everything, who needs that negativity? Life is s*** enough.

    Just glad I found an awesome man who didn't want kids either, to marry. Life is good when you're on the same page.

  • Agree with all ^this. Also, OP is a drama queen.
    The older son is seen as amazing. Uh... he's 4. He's not much more than a hypermobile lump of clay at this point, easy to handle because of his size and still spouting "I love you Daddy" per his biological imperative to keep being fed and sheltered. Yeah, lots of "character" there...
    But OP's life has been utterly ruined by a whinging potato that can't even speak full sentences yet.
    If OP's life is that easily thrown into chaos, he should have been neutered. Nobody deserves the alternative: having kids you don't want and can't raise properly, or being raised by someone who resents you. Anyone who loses their mind and starts squalling "Buuuut it's a CHIIIIILD" is incapable of this kind of basic rational thought, and that's a damn shame.

  • Well ok. Hmmm. I want to not like you for disliking this small child, but I can't quite reach dislike. First of all, if your business is failing you may have a carrier in writing. You're quite charismatic and it comes through well in your writing. Honestly, look into this.

    You're placing a lot of blame on a small child, where more of it needs to fall on the wife. I don't have any solutions for you. I agree with your advice, except the first step. Even if a woman was to agree to a plan for a surprise pregnancy, as soon as that baby is inside her all bets are off. I am a woman by the way. The rest I have no issue with. I have been married and I will never be married again. I think protecting one's self in wise. I hope you can come to love this child as it grows. I hope you can find freedom and happiness. Good Luck <3

  • This surprisingly rational comment is so decent I don't even want to say anything nasty to the OP. I even want to wish the guy well! Now where does that leave me? Well, I have no kids, and no desire to have any, and am more glad than ever to be 42 and childless, manhood intact.

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