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I shouldn't but I do.
Off the bat, I am in the most loving relationship I have ever experienced outside of my family.
It is my freshman year of college. Last semester I caught sight of this girl that lives in my dorm. I don't know her very well.. in fact hardly at all. I once saw her at a small lecture and I've seen her in the elevators where she once talked to me. But that was the extent of it. I was immediately attracted to her because on the surface of things we have a lot of common interests. Though, I am not actively bisexual and I have no real reasons for liking her, I do. I don't want to. I know its wrong to have these feelings while I am with someone else, but I can't help myself. In any case, I hardly ever saw her anyway so I put the whole thing to rest before I left for winter break, hoping I would get over it. I did for winter break, and I was happy that I did.
Just my luck, she is now in one of my classes. I go to a small school, therefore we have small classes. so it isn't as if I can avoid her. Now that I am in that intimately sized class once a week, these feelings are coming back. I get to indulge in seeing her and staring at her and just wishing that I was her type. sometimes I even get to talk to her in a fleeting instance. though, I know the girl's she is friends with/ into, and I am no where near any of them.
Ultimately, I am most likely not going to act on it. I was a notorious cheater for my own standards in high school with ironically major guilt issues. I have no desire to resurrect those days.
To be honest, this situation is even too futile for anyone to give it the time of day--I am not her type, I have a boyfriend (that I am just as equally interested in), I am not even sure if I am even THAT interested in women, and overall I am too nervous around her. It would never work out and I am not even sure why I have these feelings to begin with.
I'm not sure what anyone can really tell me, given what I have said. I guess I just need an outsiders opinion.
Thanks to all that help out.
PS: I was too shy to tell her happy birthday today, so i'll say it here even if she never sees it and in hopes that it brings her a good day.
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