i was so hurt after you killed yourself. i always replay the last time i saw you in my head and then i see you alone, dying on the cold tiles. now all i can do is drink and cut. i wish i could just cry like a normal person. i want your mom to know how sorry i am and i wish i would've known what you were planning to do, so i wouldn't have to hear people talk about how terrible you are. i never thought you were even if you were just "killing to kill."