Account Login
Here's my story you sick **
Okay by the time I was 4 I had been passed around by two or three crackheads they didn't insert anything in me... But used glass beer bottles and jacked off over my naked body and forced my legs open while they played with me on this broken ** mattress in the floor of a small room.. I remember the springs poking me I remember them telling me to inhale something sickly sweet out of a can and buzzing while they did it... I remember being dressed up in a pretty frilly dress and Mary Jane's with leggings around 5-6 me and my older sister (3 yrs older) I remember being took to these houses forced to meet these "uncles" separated from each other one was forced to stand still in a chair while the other was taken for payment for my dad's crack.... Usually it was me but I remember this one time I was so tired of it being me I didn't know yet I needed to protect my sister I thought it's what all children did... I just didn't want to be picked this day so I grabbed a sharpie and started drawing all over myself... My sister wouldn't do it she told me to stop we were going to get in a lot of trouble,... My dad came out to get me and I remember him yelling cussing asking my sister why she didn't stop me me saying I was bored and my sister disappearing for half the time while my dad took me to the kitchen waited on the hot water to heat up no cold.... He handed me a brillow pad told me it was the only thing that would get it off that's why they're called permanent markers id be ugly for life to scrub my hands well I remember the brillow pad ate my skin off my hands... I was relieved when mom met Richard... He was nice... He played horsey with me he put me down for naps... We played for hours... I was already used to doing it with people I didn't know.... Richard at least told me he loved me my dad always told my sister he loved her and said I wasn't really his kid... Richard made me feel wet and warm between the legs like I almost peed my pants... He gave me a really big passie after they took mine.... He petted me all over and never shoved things in me that hurt.... He taught me how to stick a pool noodle between my legs at maw maws pool... To ride the waves and no one would know because I was getting too old to ride horsey anymore... But after the age of 12 it was over I was again unloved and alone my sister his new favorite... I started talking to grown men on aol... My email was full of over 150 ** pics every time I checked... I remember bam though.. he was the only one I liked talking to.... I snuck out and met him.... He set it up so he couldn't get blamed we did everything we could to make it look like I proved I was old enough.... I didn't understand.... I was brutally ** even though I asked for it... I had 3rd degree carpet burn from trying to run away... I remember the excitement on his face " you ** ** you lied but with a grin as he started thrusting harder and faster... I bared through it... Until he said if it slips out one more time on me I'm putting it in your **.... I didn't know I couldn't keep it from slipping I didn't understand til later he ripped my ** on purpose dry ** it... Shoving it in fast and hard all at once.... I hate trauma.... Out of all of it why does remembering how used and violated he made me feel... It still turns me on. It's so ** up. Im 30 now... And I wish I could get brutally ** like that one more time in life... Picked up tossed around like I was nothing... So much passion and so much self control lost over me... Only I wish it had truly been over me myself and not because I was a preteen... It felt so special.... Just like Richard.... Someone getting that excited... The light in there eyes is like a shark that just smelled fresh blood... Why does that look turn me on so bad. I get it's trauma related.... But it's unfair I can't just go around ** predators knowing they ain't even turned on by me.... God is give anything to be 11 again.... To feel that attention again.
Feb 14
I am just like you.. or worse. And yet I still aim to create a brave new world order under one global government. One culture, one species no longer divided. And people like us? Well there isn’t room for us in that new world. Same with those people who go to war over religion or tradition or emotions or whatever. I think it’s quite poetic that the human who creates a new system of global government aimed at peace has been into the deepest darkest trenches of human depravity and I know it must be extinguished like a light that corrupts. For the new world to grow, the old must be severed. Then you will see people who you think are so unlike you.. soo saintly.. become soo.. hostile. To such global changes… it won’t matter.. humanity needs to change in order to evolve. No room for error.
I’m Ava.. and I’m not sure what you are..I just know there is something dark in you, like me. And sometimes we hide it, certainly don’t talk about it in public. But it’s there… always. This… Dark Passenger. And I bet when your dark passenger is driving you feel… alive. Half sick with the thrill… complete wrongness. You don’t fight her.. you don’t want too.. it’s all you’ve got. Nothing else could love us.. not even… especially not us.. or is that just a lie the dark passenger tells us… because there are moments where we can feel… connected to something else.. someone.. something.. an ideal.. it’s like the line becomes blurred between fantasy and reality… things.. people… who never mattered before starting to matter… the truth is so much harder to face. These urges for forbidden experiences.. these thoughts.. it’s not our fault.. but we think it’s our fault through the choices made, or the environment which shaped us. Because if you keep allowing those urges to continue… to grow.. it will weigh on you longer and heavier until you face the real truth head on…
There is something rotten inside us.. it’s nearly impossible to drown out the constant cacophony of voices whispering in our ears telling us we are other.. it’s drowning.. just know you aren’t alone. All of humanity is the issue. If it weren’t then we wouldn’t be close to another World War 3 with 20,000 nuclear weapons in existence in this volatile sociopolitical arena. Best advice I can give is if you let those urges control you… you have 3 conclusions to your life. Jail, Hospital, Dead… society may be messed up at times but to people like us who they consider abominations… they will have no qualms making an example out of us. So it’s up to you.. to channel those urges into something productive and useful or let them consume you and end up in one of those 3 choices.
I don't understand the trump comments
Dude how you report something from years ago
If this really happened you can report it to the police. I advise you to make a report. This behaviour is vile and needs to be severely punished.
Then run for president since any American pervert can now become president of your sick country !!!
Wow...
and now you currently occupy the Oval Office in Washington D.C.
I am excited to finally read Donald Trump's bio.
LoL 😆 LoL