Sometimes I want to kill you. I think about turning around and punching you square in the face. But I don't. Sometimes I think you are a lying, stupid, selfish b****, and I would love to say that to your face. But I don't. I want to scream at the top of my lungs that my life would be so much better without you, because I truly believe it would be. But I don't. Sometimes I want to tell you that I wish you were never born, and I never want to see your ugly face again. But I don't.
I never do any of it, because as much as I can hate you, you always come back because you need my help, or you need a friend. And I can't turn that down. But I'm not always nice to you because you need me. Sometimes I'm only the bigger person because I am expected to be. I am expected to be more mature. Everyone expects me to be the good little girl, who is happy and friendly all the time.
But in truth, I think that I don't do any of it, because somewhere deep down, I love you. It is a fact that I must face, that I can never hurt you.