ok, so I posted on here a while ago. I
ok, so I posted on here a while ago. I still have the same problem and dont know what to do about it. I go to to a pretty tough college. When I started here, I thought about coming out and starting over. That way everybody would know me first off as being bi/gay whatever. The only problem with that was that I actually know people here, and they know me as being straight. Now it is too late because everybody I know here now thinks of me as being straight. Also though, this is a strang twist. I am both attracted to males and females. When I am sober however, it leans more towards males. Is there any way that I can let some guy that I know is gay know that I would like to try something with him, withough everybody else being able to tell? Is there some special code or something that I dont know about? This school is full of guys, so there are plenty of opportunities. As far as coming out publicly, I dont think I'm ever going to be able to do that. I cant sacrifice the name that I have built up. Im both tired of living a lie, but also not willing to throw away everything I have to be happy. I dont think my parents would be able to handle the news. I'm pretty sure that my dad would cut me off and I would have to pay for college all on my own. All this and exams coming up are really stressing me out. It would be sooo nice to be able to go to my boyfriends room and just lay there with him. That would make everything so much better. Any suggestions or positive comments are appreciated.