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Afraid
That every time I see a couple on the street who are holding hands I want to tear them to pieces, but if they kiss then I feel sick.
Whenever I've had a partner, as soon as they touch me in a sexual way I freeze up. I've even puked once or twice.
I think i'm the ultimate icicle, and I'm afraid.
It sounds to me like you could have been abused physically or sexually. That is just my guess. IT might be wise for you to talk to a counsellor who can help you with these emotions.
I hope you feel better soon.
Maybe you're no an icicle, maybe you were hurt when you were younger. And seeing somebody else be intimate makes you remember something you'd rather not.