Don't know where to start

I don't really know where to start. I'm a 27 year old high school dropout. I'm married but I think my wife would be better off alone. I wish I was dead, and have for fifteen years, but I don't have the b**** to kill myself. I know that this is the internet, and most responses to this will probably be encouraging me to take my life so I think I'll turn off the notifications for this confession. I wish I was dead but I'm too scared to die. I can't keep doing this.

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  • I think you need to seek therapy.You need to understand why you feel this way and try to overcome these thoughts/feelings,of low self-worth and suicidal thoughts.
    Once you've gained more self-worth and understanding of your internal demons,you could return to higher education.It's never too late,to return to education.I'm 31 and returning to College,to study a Business degree :)
    Even if you can't commit to study a course in person,research some online/distance learning courses instead.I've primarily studied with,the Open University and it's worked wonderfully,around my personal life.
    I don't have a family,but I do have a partner and a job.So I can't commit to full-time education,unless I'm ready to commit to not working again.

    Maybe,embark on commencing with activities/hobbies that you've always wanted to.That'll should improve your confidence and self-worth.Do you like boxing/kick boxing? Those are good outlets.Maybe, talk to your wife about how you're feeling.Hopefully, she could help and support you,through it.

    I just don't want you to feel,alone.

  • nothing is so bad it cant get better.

  • No, you're right, you can't keep living like you are. You have to make an effort and make your life better, because you deserve to be happy. You're only 27, you have a long life ahead of you. School isn't for everyone. But if your high school diploma is keeping you from doing something, then go and get your GED. There's probably a program online you can enroll in. Education is always available to you. Your wife would be devastated if you harmed yourself. So please go and find a good therapist, they can help you with your depression. Find the b**** to go and get the help you need. Don't for a second think that you're not worth being happy, getting help or achieving your goals.

  • DITTO !

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