Hypocritical Love

I don't really know how it happened, but I started to crush on a boy that I know for a fact I cannot have. I met him online through association of a few other friends, and I knew from the getgo that he had a girlfriend. For a while, I actually thought he was pretty annoying and couldn't really stand him, but we started talking more often and I started to realize that he's very sweet, very talented and he's really cute, too.

I realized about a week ago I had started to have a small crush on him--not a HUGE crush but just like a little puppy crush, like I want to talk to him more and get to know him better. I figured I would just ignore it because as I said, he's got a girlfriend and I JUST met him. I tried talking to him less too because I didn't want to get too attached or anything but of course, he started talking to me more and I was stupid and didn't ignore it...

It's kind of a tricky situation because I've always been the kind of person who really, really looked down on "crushing" on people online--I think people who can do long distance relationships are cool and I don't judge them! But I think it's really silly to "crush" on somebody from the internet unless you've known them for a VERY long time and have REALLY gotten to know them. So, because of this, I can't really talk to my friends about it because I'll look like a flaming hypocrite and really I look pretty silly crushing on a boy like this so quickly in the first place...

I've been doing a really good job keeping it to myself and ignoring it, though what's concerning me about all of this is that jealousy starts getting pent up really deep inside of me whenever I see him talking to his girlfriend (who I'm also friends with) and even one of the friends we met each other through (who likes him now and he used to like in the past.) I feel really stupid because I have no RIGHT to be jealous, he and I have only known each other a few months and I shouldn't have a crush on him at all, but I keep feeling really envious, to the point where I have to stop talking to his girlfriend and our mutual friend for a while or I'm afraid I'll say something nasty.

I'm not really looking for advice on pursuing him or advice on how to wait it out, but rather advice on how to get over this little crush phase before it becomes something bigger and without telling any of my friends about it. I keep reminding myself that 1) I barely know him and 2) he's taken, but somehow this isn't really helping. I just want this phase to be over because it's really silly.


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  • You can pass though this stay strrong

  • It will end. Just don't worry about it.

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