I hate being a parent

You paint a depressing picture, of parenthood. But I don't blame you.
You're expressing your feelings. If you can't do that, you may become depressed.

I don't have any children, I made a conscious choice not to from an early age. Believe it or not, I knew I didn't want to be a parent from the age of six years and I'm now 32, I still stand by my choice. My partner feels the same way I do, in regards to having a childless life :)

I feel sympathy and empathy for you, because if any parent knew how they'd feel becoming parents, prior to 'actually becoming a parent, they may have chosen differently' Unfortunately, no one can predetermine that :(

Childfree dude. Get your facts straight

Part un. Actually you can predetermined many things. You just have to KNOW yourself. Try out things. I KNOW I don't want kids, I don't find babies cute, so I won't be stupid enough to have kids, but remain happy living MY life on my terms.
If I had a kid, and I'm doing an activity I enjoy, I could get an annoying phone call of my kid or partner, saying "oh Billy is vomiting, we need you now", "Babe, the principal called, Sandra is in trouble" or "Mommy, daddy forgot to pick me up". EVERYTHING is abt him/her so I'd have to drop everything from what I was enjoying , even though it could be an activity I do as my pastime that occurs once a year due to having a kid and hectic scheduling. Nope. Kids aren't worth it. I cherish my privacy and me time greatly, and if anyone invades it, I leave, tell that person off, etc.
What some of you ppl forget to realize, once you birth that child, your life will be nonexistent and it'll be all about your child's. And if some of you parents are hoping your kids to care for you in your elderly years thinking they're obligated to, like some sort of debt, allow me to ask this: are you guys lazy enough to care for yourselves in your elderly years or just scared? Do you guys already know you'll grow weak bones, become lazy and become dependent for your kids, forcing them to become slaves?

Part deux. EXERCISE!!! Remember: YOU brought them into this world without them having no say. Treat them right, discipline and pray for the rest. They might care for you, be your best friend (like my mommy and myself) they might die, they could move away or grow to hate you, watch it. They don't owe you anything. Do your job, like it or not with a smile on your face, fake or not. I'll spare those ppl that say "you'll be a terrible parent" well ignorami, I will never be a parent. "Whew!" On your part as if it matters in your life or affects it. Why are you worried about an imaginative kid that'll never be borne from my body and live in this world? I'm pro-choice btw.
Go ahead, insult me for being too wise and shrewd enough to avoid being in all you regretful ppl shoes. Call me selfish. I rather be selfish for enjoying the things I love with other ppl that I love than being selfish, have a kid and neglecting it. Everyone' lives are different. If you can't accept that, buh-bye and get over it. Look in the mirror before judging me. I dare you. I just love my life immensely for it to be destroyed by a kid, but it'll be my fault.

Toodles.

Except you're the father? Imagine how trapped your ** wife feels you selfish prat

It sounded like his wife was the one who wanted more kids. It was pretty clear. I'm with somenw who wants more kids. And seriously...of you're not allowed to ever express this then you're living a lie. I hate being a father too. I'm involved, but my life has come to a halt. We argue about more children while I hope to go to college before I'm 30.

I ** hate my toddler for the pure fact he doesn't ** sleep EVER

YouTube Naptime 😂

Force him by yelling and STOP being his friend by negotiating with a little idiot that only comprehends to colors and cartoons. Lock him in his room until he tires himself out. Strap him to his bed. Drug him. Really?! That impossible stupid?! Do your job before you noticed you raised a criminal with antisocial problems that results in him shooting and committing mass murder. Good job.

If only they knew how much I hate the word "mommy."
I cringe at the sound and I hide it with a fake smile. 😫

** you loser

Duh. We know and witness it.

Wow. How can you NOT see this coming? You're meant to be childfree. And we know.

We know. But I smirked at you idiots in public cuz I know my life is FABULOUS.

This post isn't fun anymore. Too many childfree people commenting on it. Yawn...

Of course YOU'RE tired. You've haven't caught up on your sleep hahaha.

Hey, some of us childfree people may become parents that's why we're on here. So many of us hope and pray for it. Many of us want what we think you guys have: we look at the Facebook pics pf parents smiling with their kids, and they all seem so happy when they're out in the park and parents always tell us how ** awesome it is so we want a piece of that. What the reality is I have zero clue.

The truth is, one child is totally worth it if you can make the necessary sacrifices. Two or more is not. You end up giving up way too much of your selves with more than one.

Wrong dear. You confused "childfree" to "childless". Real childfree people come here due to reassurance (which we're aware of the pros and cons) and to see what sort of ** is ike on the other side of the fence. Heck some parents who wish to be childfree go on childfree sites and lie and blather the martyrdom and state "I feel sorry for those who choose not to have kids" which is a projection. Real childfree people will do whatever it takes to prevent becoming slaves to lil crotchfruits, and that includes abortion with no regrets.
Real childfree people KNOW having a child or children will ruin their lives and we can see it coming. We dont have to "give it a try" to know what it's like, yuck! That's because we can see through and witness the bullcrap parents go through with their own spawn in our daily lives. Some seem blessed, a lot look miserable and exhausted. To us, the cons outweighs the pros. Childless is one who can't have a child yet yearns one. Childless people are the ones you're referring to and are on the fence and we're never childfree in the first place. Nice try though. Bloop!

These posts are the reality of it. It **. Ur life is over especiallybif u have more than 1.

Those people u see on facebook smiling with their kids are f**king liars. Ur childless friends stop coming by, ur trapped on the weekends while everyone else still gets to do things, endless diapers, endless messes to clean up, endless piles of laundry, endless screamimg and temper tantrums, endless feeding, endless tiredness, endless saying dont do this or that. U become a mindless slave. Its no walk in the park!

You're childless. Don't speak for the childfree because you're not one yourself imposter. Dont marginalize us. We dont go on fb and yearn for something we dislike or hate LOL trust and believe. You're confusing praying for something we DON'T WANT to pity as in "Thank God we dont have those" Speak for yourself and wallow in your lies.

I'm on here so that I can make an informed decision on whether to be a parent or not.if everyone was as honest as you guys I wouldn't need to be here,commenting away.and I disagree with this very anti-child commenter: Not everyone knows if they would enjoy having kids.it's very easy to listen to your parents and friends and be convinced that kids are a good idea.

I love my daughter dearly but the teenage years are tough on me. The attitude, the hormones, the disrespect. I'm too young for this, I honestly want to get up and just leave and never look back. I sacrificed for her, went through ** and back when she was younger to secure a future for her and I am the hatred one and her father, who barely does **, is her savior. I'm in my mid 30s and about to get remarried soon. I've made it clear that I do not want children. If he decides to change his mind and wants kids, because he doesn't have any, then God help him because this bank is closed for withdrawals. By the time my daughter heads off to college, I'll still be young.

Hello. At least u had her young. I wish I would of had my children young and ended up having them at 37. What was I thinking. Hang in there. U r almost there.

Why does it matter how old or young you are? Having them too young means you were bored or NOT thinking or in stupid puppy love that dies when the kid is born. Having them too old means youre just selfish, risking your child will develop a mental disability and youre gonna age FASTER and be more miserable with your look-alike grandkid LOL You had them regardless. Live it with.

Janet Jackson. Selfish.

Get those tubes tied QUICK and lie. What he won't know, won't certainly hurt him ;-)

Agreed tie those ** tubes

That phase or pubescebt angst of hers will fade and you two will be best friends but do NOT be her friend and she'll see her dad as the lousy one...maybe

"Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children." You may feel young, but you'll look like you have a child.

You're as young as you feel. As long as she's not trying to be a supermodel or pop star, she's good.

So glad I found this thread. I swear I feel like the only one I know that absolutely HATES being a parent. If I would have known it would be like this I would have given him up at birth. He's almost two now and the horrible feelings about basically losing my whole life haven't gone away. Everyone says it gets better. IT DOESN'T. If you're not absolutely certain you want a kid, or feel a baby is the ONLY thing missing from your life, I don't suggest having one. I HATE IT so much and it's like no one understands how I feel about it. I would try to talk to an adoption agency and play the "I'm not the parent this kid needs" card - apparently there's no legal limit on the age at which you can put a kid up for adoption but he's attached to us now and I don't wanna ruin someone's life with attachment issues by dumping him with some other family. (who could probably love him and provide for him better). I'd feel too guilty anyway. I just wish I could stop hating it so much. I feel like once he's about 10 or so it won't be so bad. He just totally wrecked my life. Yes, I was on birth control because I knew I didn't want kids. If I could go back, I'd either abort or adopt him away. My husband hardly talks to me about this because he doesn't like to listen to me say I hate being a mom, but I do! It's horrible and I can't believe anyone does this on purpose!

Seems like your man used you as a baby making machine that he wish could mute you...I'm sorry. Could've avoided that drama by being smart, thought it through and not falling for it.

I hope you know how pathetic you sound. Your poor child.

You're just a selfish mindless woman. You had a chance to abort but "who could probably love him and provide for him better" is just plain bs. That's like an idiot owner raising a dog, wants to get rid of it but thinks no one could do better, which you have no idea of. I hope you don't commit a mercy murder-suicide like some psycho moms did. You brought this upon yourself. Your unfortunate kid with a lousy mom like you...smh

Seriously you need a hug. I feel so bad for you especially because you're trying to express what seems to be a real desire and your husband is ignoring it. He's probably too scared of being a single dad to say so leave! Or too afraid of societal pressure to give his kid away. I've thought about running away. There's too much pressure being a wife and a mother. Always be patient, always be kind, stay **, be on top of your chores **! It's exhausting. I hope you find peace.

Have you ever thought about trying therapy to see if that helps? Sometimes just being able to talk to someone else about some of the things that we feel are too taboo to say out loud in our society can be helpful.

Or someone who can help you see all of your options and how to move forward in a way that benefits your parenting and relationship with your children.

My kid is almost 20 and is still in high school ,why did I have to have this stupid stupid kid?

Because you're selfish and we're bored and living through your kid because of your boredom. Live with it.

What???

Well...not EVERY child will be alike. They're their own individual. They all won't be the same. Some will be born with mental disabilities, autism, terminal illness, become gay, lesbian etc or ADHD or whatever bullcrap. Some will drive you to murder your own kin, suicide, neglect, cause you embarrassment, etc., like the mother who pushed her autistic son off the bridge because she couldn't "deal with him" anymore.

You're lucky you don't have a kid with Down Syndrome or thats paralyzed due to some screwed up genetic issue and you'd have to care for her until he/she dies; so you'll be a slave and I've read stories. Your kid could miraculously turn out incredibly intelligent, see how you truly are, and somehow loathe you and not have kids of their own and maybe disown YOU and think "why did I have to have this selfish, egotistical parent that doesnt deserve the title of 'mom' or 'dad'?"(I assume). So stop your complaining, count your blessings and live with it. It's logical. It's life. Regret is SUCH an awful feeling and no escape? That's a ** ON earth. That's YOUR child and he/she NEEDS your help in school and many more issues he/she will deal with.

If every child was born normal, healthy, then the population would explode but it'd drop drastically as well. You probably deserved it even though you didn't WANT him or her the way they are and THAT'S SELFISH but you're stuck with what God assigned (punished) you with. Don't blame your kid for being stupid. Dont hate him or her for being gay, lesbian, transgendered. Blame yourself and your stupid genes for passing it down. Duh. Childfree eating this up HA

Lol you think your kid will move out at 18 you must be smoking something funny, your kid could be that man who still lives at home at the age of 37 and still works at McDonalds.

It varies from culture to culture. I've met ppl, mainly some Indians who don't really see that as a bad thing until their kid marries, thus moves out. It's the norm in their society and I never sense or see complaints, more like praises. Western society is self-destructing.

I have to ask out of curiosity, if you all hate being parents so much, why did most of you have more than one child? No offense, but it seems logical your troubles would at least double.

That person was a slave to ** with out protection, lol.

That's what I keep thinking too. Why have more than one. I unfortunately have twins my first time around and it freakin **. One would have been more than enough for me. I tell everyone just have one if u r thinking about having kids. Only one. It will be so much easier.

No. You mean to tell people on the fence of having kids to try babysitting. Not trying it out. Youre becoming deceitful and misleading clueless couples into a misery that you don't want to suffer alone. Misery DOES love company. I wouldnt take ANY advice from you. I'll just look at you from top to bottom, seeing how exhaustingly old and frazzled you look and just enjoy my childfree life. We look a lot better anyway😏😌

The reason why I had two kids is because kid number one was a mistake. Then guess what, my wife said she was pregnant again. That makes two mistakes.

That's your fault too. Take accountability. Have you seen the smallest violin?

Youre the primary mistake for doubling MORE of your mistakes you sniveling coward. Should've avoided touching her.

For real. They know what they did. Idk why these idiots act as if they have no idea how a baby is made. Its takes 2 to tango!! Its like men forget a woman could get pregnant and "oops! Shes pregnant! Oh woe is me! How'd that happen? I had no idea!" Really? You forgot a sperm and egg could form a baby, you forgot inserting your sad ** into her **, squirting unprotectedly into her uterus is procreating? Really?

A lot of you men dont think at all when it comes to **. Look at the unloyal men who cheat on their wives, sleep with other women and an illegitimate child is the result. Or worse, the other woman ends up murdered because the man didnt wear protection and she wants to keep the baby. Scott Peterson. There's a lot. The men are at fault to for being stupid. No one feels sorry. You're both guilty.

Look at Marriage Bootcamp, Dani and Victor met through ** and that results in a child thats of course innocent and has ** immature parents. She knew wgat she did. Ew and Tori Spelling and disgusting (ex) husband...gross. Breeder=mindless fools whom shouldnt breed. There should be mentality/psychological tests before producing a kid...too bad. You all deserve your **.

They think they'll grow to love their kids. BAHAHAAAAAA

Because they're stupid and reek envy

Uggggggggh kids slow your WHOLE LIFE down omg,, i already kno

Yeah after the miserable fact of being too late to change it

Because they're altricial, meaning taking a long time to develop, I have no patience for a mindless idiot to raise. Nope! Hurry up!

I already know and I have no kids and I don't want them. Useless, slow, ruin your routine lil snot rags. They wouldn't dare being in my way. Live obstacles. I'll leave them behind or abandon them. Keep up or I'll ditch.

You sound Like me. I love my kids I really do but I hate being around them, I'd take a bullet for them but every time they scream mommy, mommy, mommy over and over or throw 3 hour tantrums because I turned off Caillou I want to walk out the front door and never come back I have no Idea how their father handles them. The only plus side I can think of is that I'm still pretty young and my youngest is 2, so I'll only be in my 30's when I get my life back.

The childfree community know this. That's why majority of us travel more often. It's growing.

Hahaha u turned off caillou

You want to walk out the front door, when your kid throws a THREE HOUR TANTRUM and you're not whipping them or yelling at them?! You're allowing this to happen you dolt!!! You deserve this. You're just incredibly obtuse and a lazy parent. You don't love your kids, if you did, you'd discipline them. Have you heard of tough love?! Apparently NOT.

Have to rain on your parade, but your kids may stay with you FOREVER, so you may feel young as spring chicken, but you'll look like a frazzled, exhausted parent. If you had them "pretty young" you didn't have a life then and probably now. Hope you do get "your life" back. Which I doubt that'll happen.

I swear its like you wrote this for me. I feel the exact same way. This new girl In got with is pregnant. Idk what to do. I'm so depressed at the thought of another infant baby. A lot of days I think about killing myself just to end the misery.

Then you'll be in a worse place than now. Should've thought that through buddy. CONVERSATION! Condom! Now imprisonment. Abortion or miscarriage.

I know this is dark but if I was in your shoes I would grab a few valuable things that are mine and start driving across the country and never look back. I would pay 115% of my child support dues every month and think of it as a monthly fee for getting my life back.

That's not dark, that's just being honest although a smidge pathetic, but honest. I'd do the same. At LEAST you're supporting your kin and not being a deadbeat. I'd pay 1000% though. Good comment. Funny actually. I've known people who don't have intrinsic relationships with one or both of their parents. So that can be a good thing.

I'm a parent of 6-year-old twin boys. Both my husband and I hate being parents to the core. This is a freaking life sentence that we won't ever get out of. I keep thinking maybe it would be better with just one but we have double trouble everything. We hate everything about parenting. The con outweighs the pros. And it's not their fault. It's our fault for even considering having children. Everything revolves around them and it **. My husband and I try to hide from them in a different room just so we can just sit and have a grown up conversation and be together alone but it never last long. We just look forward to bedtime every night. That's the only freedom we have. Life sentence I tell ya.

You guys were meant to be childfree...too late now.

Yes. U r so very right. But we give our all to the boys. We try very much to be good parents. Overall, they r happy kids and they will never know how we feel. We do love them, by dang, parenting is hard.

Thank you. You're doing a good job. Seeing all the parents on here complain and vent, it indicates parenting is certainly hard and difficult. Hang in there!

I regret getting married and having a kid. My daughter is 3 months old now and I hardly feel any bond towards her. I simply go through the motions and pretend that fatherhood is such bliss. It's not. Marriage and fatherhood is a lifetime of doing things you don't want to do but do anyway just to avoid the nagging and arguments. I hate being at home as all I do is endless chores that my wife tells me to do while the little one bawls her head off. I feel like a beast of burden. I have no energy to do anything and I have nothing to look forward to except death I suppose. Sometimes the "noise" of all my responsibilities is so deafening I can't think straight and just pray I get a aneurysm in my sleep. Yes I pray for death even though I'm an atheist, that's how bad it is. Don't get married or have kids.

Hi there. I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought about death also because of the kids. My husband and I had those thoughts also. But thank goodness we r still here and making the best of whatever. Hahahaha. I just keep telling myself this is temporary. They will grow up. That has kept me going. Hang in there.

You sound like this oblivious yet stupid, in denial mother at my work. She complains how she'd love to die for a day, take months off, and how she so tired, etc. but backpedals like a martyr, which I don't buy. Death better than raising a child eh? I can refute the "children are worth it" bs. She's not bright so...I lack sympathy whatsoever.

This is less about marriage and more about WHO you married. I have an amazing, close marriage with no children in sight. Ever. And it's a blast. My husband and I are best friends and truly enjoy our life together. We share the responsibilities equally and discuss everything openly. Marriage isn't for everyone, that's true. But not all marriages are ** like yours.

Bruh you could've avoided this...If only you BOTH talked about whom wants what and if it would make you happy, if only you wore a condom, if only you didn't believe her if she claimed to be on the pill, threatened to leave you, thus manipulating you, if only you visualize or imagine how having a child is difficult and hellish and rarely pleasant and horrid, like babysitting or spending time with children, if only you were REALLY decisive and knew yourself and what YOU wanted and not let others/society dictate and pressure you, if only you left your wife before tying the knot of matrimonial trap and end up with someone with the same likes/preferences, if only you guys had an abortion, if only you were smart, if only you knew...I see why you parents tell and lie to the childfree to join in your miseries by feigning "it's fun! The greatest love/gift from a child". Not falling for it. No thanks. Children in the future will starve or worse. Not my problem, can't feed your kids, don't bother breeding then. Myself helping out will surely enable stupid, mindless couples who shouldn't have kids, unfortunately have kids.

I Second that!

Wow. Another one wishing for death...Looks like that empty void in your life will never be fulfilled through the joys of parenting/marriage, which consists almost 98% of sacrifices. That is required when you mindlessly yet impetuously bring another being into this world...I feel sorry for your kid more.

I can't...this is sad

What do you think would help you alleviate the stress a bit that helps you deal with fatherhood in a way that helps you? (besides dying or leaving?)

ie: Counseling, a divorce that entails co-parenting, support group, scheduled time away to recharge, hanging out with your guy friends to feel more of a sense of yourself besides just being a father/husband...etc

What would make you feel more supported that is doable for you now?

Wishing you well!