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What's sad is that I already know what they're thinking when they IM me
I can't go onto a chat program without feeling like a cheap **. The only people who talk to me either confess feelings to me or try to seduce me within 2 months tops. When I say that I'm not interested, they get worse until I purposely scare them away or just snap at them to leave me alone. Then no one talks to me again. Rinse, lather, repeat.
I wish that people would not use me as a coat hanger to hang their **. I wish that some of my friends would remember that I exist and check up on me every once in a while. But I'm too scared that if I mention anything, I'll be seen as a needy friend and lose what people I do have. Or they'll think I'm a ** when I bring up my twisted suitors.
At the same time, this has happened long enough for me to feel like I need to block everyone on AIM and Skype, delete my facebook account, and hide for months on end. I'm not in a relationship, but at heart I'm committed to this person I've been crushing on for a couple of years now. I don't want people that I'm not attracted to to bother me anymore, but I can't reach out for help. What the ** am I supposed to do?
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