Why can't I stay away?
We fight and say things we don't mean.
We break up.
I do things in that break that I hate myself for.
Yet still after the hateful words,
the screaming and yelling,
I come back.
So do you.
I love you.
I'm scared to fall in love with you.
Why can't I let go of you?
Why can't I just lay in the bed with you without wanting your lips on me.
Without wanting your arms around me.
Without falling to pieces.
Why won't you hate me?
Why am I a glutton for punishment?
Why does your smile fill me with so much happiness?
Why can't I be honest with you?
Why is it so hard to trust?
Why am I so scared?
I'm not in love,
I'm not in love,
I'm not- or am I?
Who the heck knows because I don't.

May 27, 2012

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